Is this considered a loss?

I've been wondering whether this would be considered something to grieve over. I don't have many friends, so when I started talking to this girl during class in college, it was a big step for me. We began texting each other a lot and teasing each other and eventually I got her to do stuff one-on-one with me outside of class. Unfortunately, by the time I got the courage to get her to do stuff outside with me, the semester was nearly over.

Over break I called her and asked her to do more stuff with me, but she never made time for me. It's been two months now since I've last talked to her, even longer since I last seen her. When it hit me that she probably didn't even see me as anything more than a school acquaintance I took it kind of hard for a month or so, maybe more. I recently snapped out of my funk and have moved on with my life the past week, but I still think about her every day and miss her. Now that I think about it and look back on it, it almost seems like I was in a "grieving" period... I mean, think about it, I had no friends, I finally found a girl that I was probably the closest ever to, and now she's gone and I'll never see her again. It's almost like she died. Maybe worst because I even told her, the last time I talked to her, to give me a ring if she ever wanted to do something and, because she hasn't, she's obviously made the choice to reject me.

Could something like this be considered a loss? I know my funk was blown out

of proportion for something as small as this, but that's what happens when you have a scarcity of people to rely on.

At my stage, finding "permanent" friends is hard now because, I'm in graduate school now after graduating from early from both high school and undergraduate. So I'm a couple years younger than these people, who already have their own lives.
And this girl in question had a pretty strong social life already, so I think that pushed me further to the side.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I guess it could be considered a loss. I've ad this happen to me with some guys and it does hurt. I couldn't imagine what it would be like if you had no friends to begin with. But cheer up, because you'll find some one better. Just be open to it. Be a little out going and you'll be fine:D


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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • It's a sh*tty thing to happen, but yeah its a affecting you a bit harder than it should. The solution? Work on building more permanent relations. Find more friends, worry less about girls in the mean time.

    • So you're cool with dating girls that are a few years older than you, but not with having friends a few years old than you? Now I think you're just making excuses.

    • No. I'm okay with making friends a few years older. BUT, the thing is, even though I WANT permanent friendship from them, I'm finding it difficult to do so because they work or have families or already have they're "permanent" friends and aren't looking to add more. They're cool to talk with me in class, but that's basically it.

    • This girl was the first time I really made headway with someone and that's why the loss really resonates.

  • I hate reading stories that sound like my future... f***.

    It's a loss, but never is there a reason for grief. I don't care how hard it is. You must move on quickly, or you will miss your next opportunity.


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