Would my ex-boyfriend really want to be with his best girl friend who has a boyfriend?

Okay. So there are clearly tensions between my ex-boyfriend and his best friend "girl" friend. We resolved our relationship issues diplomatically and are currently friends, so I would like to know why when his friend comes around there is an awful awkward tension. As an example: my ex and I were having lunch together and his friend, this girl, joined us. She started gushing about his art and how she has been thinking nonstop about his new ideas. Clearly- this p*sses me off, however, I entertained her and sat through their annoying little conversation. It feels like there is something between them, and he's been hanging out with her a lot lately. My instincts tell me that she is up to no good, but I just don't want to believe that.

I hate the tension... and it's driving me crazy. I have to work with her... and see her all of the time. My question is.. would my ex-boyfriend really want to be with his best girl friend who has a boyfriend? If so... why?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like he is definitely attracted to her. Attraction doesn't stop just because the other person is involved with someone else. They will probably hook up at some point. Might as well come to terms with that and move on yourself, after all he is your *ex* right?

    • Correct, he is my ex. It still sucks though because we are pretty much best friends and I feel like my feelings are getting in the way of our friendship. I hate being an emotional person, I would love to be completely rational all of the time and tell myself- "he's my ex, obviously for a reason". It just doesn't seem to work that way. There are too many feelings and I am growing to resent this girl, even though I'm not sure if I have the right to dislike her.It all comes down to- she as a BF

    • Yeah it can be very tough emotionally to spend time with someone after a relationship. sounds like you two are no longer on equal footing, he is looking at other people and you are not so much.

      some people can stay friends after a break up but it is very rare, especially in younger folks and without some time apart so both of you can move on.

      when you have a new guy in your life, I think you'll look at this situation a lot different. just an opinion.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Is she cute? Do they get along well? Does he find her attractive?

    If you answered yes to all of the above we have a winner.

    • She's cute and I'm sure he doesn't have a hard time getting along with her- but she has a holier-than-thou attitude and tries to pick up other guys. Wouldn't one reason that if she treats her current boyfriend this way... that she would treat others the same? Why would he ever be interested in someone who has a bf?

What Girls Said 1

  • It doesn't really matter much if he's your ex, right? But you already seem to know that. The point is that you're allowing this to mess with your head when it's kind of pointless- you may be imagining all of the flirtation because you're already suspicious of her, and even if you aren't imagining it you can't stop them from hooking up if they really want to. You can rationalize all you want that your ex "shouldn't" want her because she has a boyfriend and such, but just because you have this expectation of how people should behave doesn't necessarily mean anyone else has to follow it. If their friendship (or whatever it may be) bothers you this much- especially considering that you work with her- maybe you should start removing yourself from the situation. You may want to be great friends with your ex, but it isn't much of a friendship if it's always making you feel so negative.


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