How do I get my ex to leave his girlfriend?

I was dating Donovan for nearly a year and he broke up with me when we had a big fight. A month before we broke up I found out that he was cheating on me with some girl named Brea. I decided that we could work things out as long as he could honestly tell me it would never happen again (which he did). When we broke up we decided to continue talking to try to work things out but I didn't know at the time that him and Brea were talking to. He told me one day, out of nowhere, that we would never be together again and that him and Brea were dating. About a month later he texted me and said he couldn't be with me but he couldn't be without me. So he started cheating on his girlfriend with me... We have been "friends with benefits" for 3 months now... I think that if he was really in love with his girlfriend like he says he is then he wouldn't be cheating on her with me... I know that I am still in love with him and I would do anything to be with him again but I'm almost positive that he doesn't feel the same about me. I tried to move on but I cant. I don't even want other guys talking to me much less starting a relationship with someone... How do I get Donovan to leave Brea so we can try to work things out?

Updates:
yesterday me and donovan were hanging out and I was going to tell him that we couldn't see each other if we weren't together. my dad called me to tell me he was leaving for Iraq and I cried in front of donovan.
donovan told me he didn't know what to say to make me feel better. he kept telling me that I will be okay but he could tell it wasn't working. so after staring at me he told me to lay down next to him and he held me for about 30 minutes.
when I told him I didn't want to cry anymore he kissed me and told me he will always be here for me. there is a part of me that believes he still loves me and maybe one day we can work things out but
most of me only thinks the worst and that he doesn't want me to think anything of the fling that we have going on. I don't know what to think anymore but I do know the nice things he does for me is what hurts me the most.

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What Guys Said 1

  • you seriously need to get some self respect. you deserve better than some guy who is doing this kind of crap. you think that if he leaves this girl then he'll be faithful to you? are you on the crack?

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    • Well I think its kind of my fault that all this happened in the first place. he asked me to stop hanging out with my bestfriend because she was nasty and he didn't trust me around her. that made me mad because I didn't want him tring to control me like that so I started lying to him about hanging out with her. he told me when we broke up it was because he wasn't happy being with me anymore because he found out that I was lying.

What Girls Said 1

  • He's already told you he would never be with you again. When he contacted you again, he said he couldn't be with you again making sure you understand that you would not be dating again. He's clarified it a lot.

    He knows you're still in love with him, that's why he knows you'll continue to sleep with him, without giving you anything more.

    If you want more, you have to stop sleeping with him. Tell him straight out, you can't sleep with him without being his one and only girlfriend. When he resists, follow through. Stop sleeping with him!

    It may hurt you for a while as he resists the ultimatum, but it will turn around for the best.

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