She finished things because she has feelings for ex... what to do?

Met a girl 4 months ago and we hit it off instantly. I had some amazing times with her - I thought that things were going really well and I am sure she did as well. We were seeing each other a few times a week but we were constantly in contact all day, everyday. We had a really strong connection.

So, last week, on the Tuesday I got a call from her saying she's having a bad day - her ex has been on the phone and has been arguing with her. She said she doesn't like him and didn't have anything good to say about him. I noticed a change in her after this and she cancelled our meet up saying she had to work. I text her asking if she was alright as it just seemed "off". I got a reply she has a lot going on and her head is all over the place.

The next day she texts saying "just friends" I asked her why and she said it all changed when the ex got in touch. She admitted that it was - she thought she was ready to move on but there's still feeling there, things were going really well but its not fair if she can't give me her all.

I had left stuff at hers so we arranged to meet up to get them back, she suggested I go to hers and get a takeaway. I went, we ate but I never said what I wanted to say.

Text her the next morning, saying I needed to get things off my chest - basically head over heels for her, we had a connection that I have never felt before etc. She replied saying she didn't realise that I felt that way, she agreed about the connection and how confortable we could be around each other but her head is all over the place and if things are meant to happen they will do and she thinks she will regret her decision.

I haven't spoken to her since - I am gutted by the whole situation. Question is - do you think she will regret it and make contact? I am not going to sit around and wait for her - I have already been on a date with someone else.

My friends say I should go no contact and move on - but I want her back!
So she text last night saying she has had a bad day, she's an idiot, she only see's the good in people and she hoped people could change but they can't.

Don't understand why she messaged me, is it just to stay in contact or is there a meaning behind the text


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's a tough one, sorry pal.
    But if she isn't over the ex ( it happens ), Let her go and figure out what she wants.


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What Girls Said 1

  • It sounds like you have deep feelings for her. And she doesn't seem like a bad person considering the way she explained the break up to you.
    If she is truly the object of your affection, then there is one thing you must absolutely avoid- regret. That's the worse feeling.
    So right now, don't listen to what others want you to do. Just listen to yourself and if you want to wait, wait for her till you're satisfied and have come to a conclusion about if she will or will not return.
    In the end whether you wait or move on, the wrong decision will only make you hurt.

    • No she really isn't a bad person which makes it harder. If she ended things badly or did bad things I would be fine... I understand how she feels but going from constant contact to nothing is killing me - I really don't think no contact is the way forward for me

    • Show All
    • As a fellow heart broken, I'll help you through this. :)

    • haha - broken heart buddies!!

      I did message her - a bit of small talk - i asked if she wanted to do something this weekend? She replied saying she is working and its difficult at the moment trying to sort everything out... I am confused by the response as in my mind its a mixed message - leaving me open to hope? Is it in my head?

What Guys Said 1

  • I dated a girl for about a year and a half and after I broke up with her apparently she went through about 24 dudes in about 6 months because none of them were like me so she just kept dumping them. So it's possible your ex is really into the other guy. Yeah, just move on.


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