My girlfriend and I have been going out for almost 8 months, we love each other deeply, and on a regular basis she tells me I'm the best guy she's ever known and how she wants to spend the rest of her life with me.
I found out last night that she cheated on me two days ago.
I confronted her about it and she was beside herself with grief over what she had done. She cried for hours. I made her tell me what happened and she said he entered her about 4 times and then she stopped it, got in an argument with him and left.
She says she'll never do anything like it again, and she seemed sincere.
I'm having a hard time with all of it but one of the things is that I didn't see any problems with our relationship, and she said that I hadn't done anything wrong. She says she doesn't know why she did it. How can she not? I would NEVER do something like that to her...
I need some advice please.
BTW, if you are wondering, I am 20 and she is 19.
She finally told me that she kissed him first, she originally said he kissed her first.
Most Helpful Guy
Dont talk to her for a little, you need her to know you're hurt and don't want to deal with it now...cheating will result in...well, more cheating...UNLESS you do something drastic about it right now, which is cut contact...call her in a week or 2 and say what's up...THIS IS ONLY IF YOU WANT HER BACK...
right now you need to analyze your relationship...what went wrong, why did she cheat(and not she better not blame it on the al al al al al alcohol)
what COULD you have done wrong - not saying you did but think
be mature, handle yourself with care...in the end everyone wants to make THEMSELVES happy, for you, right now if she's the one that makes you happy, you're going to give her another chance...
if you give her another chance you CANNOT, I repeat, CANNOT bring that up again you'll need to forget that
BUT you can only forget that ONCE you trust her again and that is a hard thing to earn back...you think she deserves a chance, do it...but you cannot let her do that sh*t to you man
you need to right now show her that you are hurt and you WILL NOT tolerate what she did...no one ever should
as far as her "hurting" herself this is a cry for ATTENTION, you cannot go there...i hope to god you are not going there now...she needs to learn to control herself, do you want to be with someone like that? I mean woah...chill, I know she's upset, but I mean if she's going ot hurt herself, you need to sit her down and be a man and calmly say
"hey, you know you hurt me real bad, real bad...i heard you were thinking of hurting yourself possibly? I don't know if that's true or not but look - I still care about you, but I'm not going ot get over this in one night, I need to trust you again and we all know it takes some time to gain that back, I need you to be strong and show me that you're mature, I don't want to hear that you might hurt yourself again, please...i need some space to clear my head, alright, ill call you in a couple of days" you can say as much of htat as you want, however you feel will work for you and you can add some stuff in there...but you're hurt man we all can see that...
everyone deserves a second chance...people DO change, I am living proof of that...but hey you're hurt, take as much time as you need to evaluate your relationship and figure out if you really are in love with her, you are young I mean 2 years younger than me but still..could you see yourself with this girl forever? make her proove to you that she only wants you and she's got to get you to gain her trust back...
if you need any more advice lemme know, just message me...hope this helps!
my fingers hurt from commenting on other posts so ima cut this one off lol, good luck and keep ur head up my dude0