Will he ever leave her?

Do you think he will ever leave her for me?

i met this man in January of last year and I told me had a girlfriend but I still got things on with him about 2 month into our relation he called me her name so I left him for two weeks, we then got back together and his girlfriend found my number in his phone and and called me so I got angry and left him once more plus I was getting tired of being his second best, every time I leave him ( 5 times) he keeps on coming back and I stupidly keeps on taking he back. he says he want to sort things out so we can be together but he is afraid I am gonna leave him after he leaves her, he also say I am very young the youngest person he has ever been with ( he is 44 and I am 21) so that kinda scares him that I may leave him for someone younger than he is. he has been with his other girlfriend for 2.5yrs and with me for 1yrs. I also started a relationship with another guy about 5 months ago I told him I was going to level the playing field and equalized thing so he has someone and I have someone. I recently told him to leave me alone and go back to his girlfriend cause after 2.5yrs she at least deserves him to be faithful to her and came to me crying saying I am the person who makes him the happiest, plus I don't know if I could really trust him if we were to get into a serious relationship (he cheated with me for a year why won't he cheat on me?) what should I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I was in a similar situation to yours so I can relate to how you feel. I met a guy while on vacation, and we kissed even though he had recently started dating a girl a few weeks earlier. We lived in different states, and he emotionally cheated on his girlfriend with me for three months. I had started dating someone else during that time but never made it official because of this other guy. The guy never left his girlfriend for me (they've now been together for ten months) despite telling me that he really wanted to be with me, and we eventually cut off all contact with each other. Breaking things off with him was the best decision of my life. When I think back on the situation, I feel so stupid and embarrassed. His girlfriend was a sweet girl and didn't deserve that. I regret what I did and have vowed that I would never be the other girl again.

    My advice to you is to let him go and find a single guy that truly deserves you. The hurt eventually goes away, and you'll feel better about yourself in the long run. If he loved you, then he would have left his girlfriend for you already. Good luck :-).

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What Guys Said 4

  • Hi,

    Honestly, no, I don't think he'll leave her. Think about it, what reason does he have to leave her. He has his main squeeze and you on the side. Every player loves this situation...and the fact that you went and found someone else is even more perfect for him. Now you both are in the same situation and he has no reason to leave his current girlfriend for you.

    You're a younger woman and I'm sorry in his eyes, in this situation you're just prey. There will probably be someone else if you do the right thing and call this guy quits. As a man I can say that as long as he gets sex from you then he's getting all he wants from you. Everything else he's feeding you is bull and his counting on your lack of experience/years to not see through his game.

    He may like you, but love...I doubt it. Now I could be wrong, but what would be the worse that could happen to you if I am. The answer: Nothing, you'll just have to find someone else. You found him didn't you, so it shouldn't be hard for you to find someone else.

    Best of luck...Hope this helps!

    Rudes

    You can always find me at therudeawakening7.tumblr.com

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  • I think you both are unstable emotionally. I believe YOU first need to figure out if you want a guy like this. Because "on top of him liking you and, you making him the happiest" He's still f***ing his wife / girlfriend. Soooo think about that. He's just looking for attention, and when one women (his lover) doesn't or can't understand/make him happy, he finds another, You.

    That's how these things go, and both parties end up hurting in the end and wasting their life that they could have spent with someone actually worth their time.

    You've no idea how many other women he's doing this same thing with.

    Woah waoh woah, he's 44? And you're 21? I think you need to go to Dr. Drew. Or counseling.

    Were you sexually abused in the past? Or anything like that? Something like that will never work out.

    Take my word, get your sh*t straight, and find someone your own age that actually cares about you. Not just for sex.

    Wow.

    Goodluck, really, it'll be a hard time.

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  • wow... he's not going to leave her. She knows about you and is still with him. You might not be the only one. He either wants both of you or he's just having fun on the side. Don't wait around and end up in their web of bullsh*t.

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  • Well Brad left Jen for Angela maybe he will do the same, the question is does he like yours more than he likes hers. Maybe he will maybe he wont, but if you keep taking him back while he is still with her their is no reason for him to break up with her and be with you if he can have both of you...Maybe give him the choice one or the other or just keep doing what you are doing and be as happy as you can be until you meet someone nicer ie make the most of what you have now ...

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What Girls Said 19

  • He has been with his girlfriend for 2.5 yrs. and with you for a year...if he was going to dump her, it would've happened, IF at all. I highly doubt that he has any intentions of terminating the relationship with the gf. Whatever he isn't getting in his relationship with her, he is getting from you. If he truly cared for you and wanted to be with you ONLY then he should have taken steps to ensure that. He has followed the same pattern for a year and it won't change. He is 44 years old and should be mature enough to determine what he wants in a lady and relationship. He is manipulative, a cheater, a liar and is using you.

    Please separate yourself from him and move on. You're so young, you shouldn't have to "share" your guy with anyone. You deserve someone who wants you ONLY, loves, desires and respects you. He is out there so start fresh and find him.

    Good luck.

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  • i mean no disrespect. I am being completely objective. and objectively, you're an idiot. the answer is obvious. start using your head and having some self-respect along with respect for the feelings of others. you pretty much deserve the mess you got yourself into. now it's time to finally clean up your act.

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  • Okay, first of all...he is already cheating on his girlfriend so he is going to turn around and do the same thing to you eventually. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but he will.

    Secondly, is this complicated situation something you want in to LIVE in the longterm? This guy just sounds like he makes his own problems and does whatever HE wants to do, he doesn't have your best interest in mind at all.

    Third, leave this guy alone. He is just going to be trouble for you, if you want someone faithful, caring, and who doesn't just tell you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear, run far away from this guy. He just sounds like a scam.

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  • he has a girlfriend. that means he's taken. don't keep waiting. get a guy who isn't taken. that solves your problem.

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  • To put it quite simple, if she's called you she knows he's cheating(to some extent/ or gut feeling). You are willing to be second best so he will keep you around and tell you what you want to hear to keep you around.

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  • He won't leave her for you. He knows you're not going anywhere. Please get out before he wastes anymore of your time.

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  • you're young, you should move on and quit him. There's no future possible between you and him, I think he'll never leave her. If he does leave her eventually, he'll probably cheat on you like he cheated on her...

    Just tell yourself you're worthy! You deserve more than being the one who waits him! I know it's not easy to make a decision but... you should leave him.

    (sorry for my english, it's not my native language)

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  • ^"... I met this man in January of last year and I told me had a girlfriend but I still got things on with him... "^

    WHY?

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    • He sid it was not a serious relationship

    • Oh. Well I guess I usually don't put faith in a person until their is not someone else in the picture.. I mean,maybe it was not serious to him, but what if t was to her... I just figure it is better to maybe let the guy know I am interested, but he should look me up when he is not in any relationship at all.

      & I was in a situation whee I was in love with this guy, but I moved & when I came back five months later than I was supposed to, he was seeing someone else. I remained FRIENDS with-

    • Him until I knew he was no longer seeing anyone...

      I do not like to hurt other people or encourage others to do so, & I don't like to expect things from people that are not sure themselves.. It is best to get involved with someone when you are both relatively stable emotionally.

      I would also feel uneasy cause if someone would leave that person then that is the type of person t leave you, or you would do it to them, cause it is a established accepted pattern.

  • Why would you want to date a guy who is unfaithful to his current partner? You don't think he'd do that to you too? Because he would. Leave him alone.

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  • That's the thing with guys if they say things like that you know it's probably never going to happen. I would move on. Obvoisly better said than done, but unfortunitally even if he does leave her for you there is a chance that he could do the same thing to YOU.

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  • Put it this way...

    Read your question through and pretend it was your best friend asking you what to do... what would you say?

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  • He's a jerk, don't waste your time, do what's right for you.

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  • no hune probably not

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  • If he's willing to cheat with you he's willing to cheat on you.

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  • Sorry but you need to seek some therapy and get away from him!Thats the first step!Why would you even get involved with a man whose seeing someone else?Theres a saying "shame on you once,shame on me twice!" Basically you knew walking into the relationship that he was taken and still chose to continue things so you were only setting yourself up.And think about it this way,if he's cheating on his girlfriend with you,most likely he will cheat on you with someone else!Sorry but its the truth.My best advice would be to forget about him completely and find someone who will respect you and give you a proper relationship...and stick to someone your own age!...and no he's not going to leave her!

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  • You are not the youngest person he has ever been with. He was 21 at one time too. Also, you are right in that if he did it with you, he will do it to you. Don't let age be a factor...21 is an adult. Now you are both at the same life stage. If you are dependent on him for support ($) it doesn't make it bad or good, but it explains why you hang around. Move on and stop that leech from robbing your time...the clock is ticking. LOL...Good Luck.

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  • When I read questions like yours, it makes me wonder if the asker is just doing it for kicks. No offense, but it should be pretty obvious what to do. It's just about being strong enough to do it. He's been cheating for SO long. Why wouldn't you leave? Why are you even hesitating? Good luck.

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  • you sound like a homewrecker. Listen, if he wants you, he'll get rid of his ex and pursue you properly. doesn't seem like that is going to happen...ever...obviously he's still with her because he does love her.

    keep the guy you've been dating for 5 months. stick with him if he's good, and forget this old 44 year old.

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  • why should he leave her? why buy the cow (you) when he can get the milk (sex) for free? you pretty much gave him all the power in the relationship so he always has the upper hand. and no you wouldn't be able to trust him anyway. you need to get yourself together and figure out why you let men use you like you're not good for anything else

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