What are his motives for dumping me so much?

So I was in a relationship with this guy for a year and best friends for two years prior.
Even in our friendship I was amazing to him and did a lot for him.
During our relationship he dumped me like 4-5 times and each time he was incredibly nasty to me in the things he said and did.
He would then come running back a week or two later like a lost puppy.
once again he dumped me a few weeks ago and once again has been so nasty e. g telling me he hates me and I'm dead to him and that he wishes he'd never met me.
THEN he calls me saying he wants to kill himself but talks to me for an hour like we are best friends.
then he decides it's okay to text me saying he got a drink with someone and thought he might like her, which of course upset me a lot we then arranged to meet and he stayed for four hours not even mentioning the girl and acting like we're best friends again.
Then once again he texts me to tell me he likes her then rings me again and talks to me like we're fine?
What the heck possesses somebody to treat someone like that?
please no snarky comments I know I messed up taking him back those times but I do not want him back now.
So I guess my question is that is he intentionally trying to hurt me?
Do you think he'll try to come back again, do I need to be prepared to tell him to F off?
also please be aware that I treated him like a king and loved him very much and honestly don't think the breakups were on me he would just flip out and end it on a whim!


Most Helpful Girl

  • He has problems and it's not your responsibility to fix him, some people need a wakeup call to change their behavior and he needs a harsh one. Just cut him out of your life completely and only if he changes the way he is behaving for good take him back, otherwise move on he is most likely the kind of person to drag you down in the mud with him so either leave him for goos or only take him back if he changes his behaviour for good. I'm not trying to be harsh with you but this is something I would do with a situation repeating itself like that all the time.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Most people don't I like to think dont' try to heart you. He was just a dick and gullible enough to keep forgiving a dick. Since he sees you and a revolving door he can run back to I would be prepared for him to try to come back again. You have to be strong and tell him your done with it.

  • are y'all having sex? I ask because if so, he could be using you for that.

  • Sounds like a guy who hates his life but can't figure out what to do to make it better and is spiraling through this weird emotional tornado but he just hasn't settled into a comfortable view of life. I know because I was this guy. I wasn't as reckless or as rude as this guy but I shared a lot with him. He's got a bunch of internal stuff that he needs to work through and he's using (whether or not he's aware of this) all of this drama to run from his issues (issues that probably aren't even that serious but he thinks they are because nothing else is really going on in his life).


What Girls Said 1

  • People deal with BS things all the time!


Recommended myTakes