Could me moving away be the reason he decided to end it? What can I do to get him back?

Me and my boyfriend broke up 2 weeks ago. He said he knows its out of blue but he fell out of love with me etc. I do not believe this could happen as there was no signs. Now I realised i might have missed a big thing which was me moving away for a while. I spoke to his sister after the break up and she said " do you think you will work out when your away" i said of course we can do it we r meant to be and ill come back after max a year. She said" thats good ill tell him that" Since then we met few times. Once was on a night out when he claimed he loves me and misses me. I spoke to one of his best friends and he said the same thing" he might be afraid. You two are really serious together living with each other since a year and now you leaving might be the reason he ended it as was afraid" He stayed with me that night as always and we were cuddling all the time saying we wish it never ended. Though next day in the afternoon i drove him back home. He invited me to his house just like always had tea but was bit cold towards me. We met again few times in college for coffee and it was fine, though whenever we got close he took a step back. I asked him why, what did i do etc. He said " it is better to do it now than when im leaving". Though i asked so is it me moving away and he said "not really but ya it adds to it" wouldn't tell me exactly and i think its because he doesn't want me to stop my dreams. he is now out almost all the time trying to be all cool but when i see him i can tell he's broken inside, and when he was leaving me he was crying so badly just like me. i just dont know if that me moving away could actually be the full reason and he didn't fell out of love just said that, because it was easier. As mentioned before- it was a shock for me, his friends and his family that he left me like that. His mum and sister said" you two are perfect, there hasn't been a day he said he doesn't love you. You were the only one for him and we hope he will wake up".

I have also noticed that he goes for drinking now a lot and when we spoke yesterday he was really down and upset so there must be something bothering him
Just to add something extra- i was his fret girlfriend, girl he kissed huged and all. He also never drunk before as thought alcohol is no good.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He is not broken, he is coping how he knows best. Normally our gut insticts are correct, you know he still loves you regardless of what he says. Its a self defense mechanism him saying he feels different. And yes distance can destroy relationships. If the two of you love each other and have a truelly good relationship that is healthy and makes you both better people (which is so very rare these days) then why not one of you move, maybe ask him if he will move with you for a year? I've made the mistake of letting someone go that i loved. If its good make it work.

    • I asked him before we broke up and he seemed to be up for it but depending on a job if he gets one there. I really dont think he has no feelings. Was so out of blue and he was crying so badly his sister said to me week later that he's devastated and yet he won't change his mind or listen :; i also think his guy friends might had something to do with it as they started going out and he was always with me on nights out so called him whipped etc. Ill do anything to get him back but i just dnt know how. It hurt me a lot when he stayed at some girls house and was so proud of himself telling me, its not like him :(

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    • He was nice at the end of the night because there was no one else to grab his attention...

    • Ehh u might be right :( so what to do now as like how to play it well

What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 1

  • Tell him that together or not you don't want to date anyone else even when your away. That you want to do what ever it takes to make it work because your crazy about him.

    I've been in a LDR with my boyfriend for the past 4 years now, and things have only become stronger between us. Skype does wonders in making the distance feel like nothing.

    • I tried that but he still claims its not you moving away but i dnt love you anymore which i dont believe. It looks like he's fighting with himself and doing all he can to forget me fast and it makes things worst for him. He goes out all the time and gets very drunk that he can't get into a night club. He became more selfish and aggressive towards others too and tries as hard as possible to show me he doesn't care but you can clearly see he does. We spoke and i said later on its now or never u can't lead me on and he said never together again. After that he went out drinking :( like its almost impossible he fell out of love like that as when he was breakig up he was crying cuddling into me saying he wish there was a reason for us breaking up and then when i give him a chance he goes off tries to do other women so badly that it is not getting normal. im worried. he said i thought i made it clear by not talking to u and i said well then we slept in bed together (just cuddle) u said u love me

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    • He may never grow up.

    • He may not.. indeed.. i just hope for the best that he will. the whole situation is sooo messed up it doesn't even add.