She's addicted to Games. How do I fix this?


I've been dating this girl for 3 months now and I feel as if she enjoys playing video games too much. What should I do, at first it was all good cause I play games too like League and Dota, but I'm not as hardcore as she is.

She plays at an internet cafe because her house does not have good internet. I love her but it is starting to hurt me. Despite all the hints that all point to the undeniable fact that she is straining the relationship, she would insist that she would be wasting the day as she does not have anything else to do at home. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and let her continue going out to the cafe (s). Unfortunately, I have reached my limit. She plays from 5pm - 2am.

I do not want to lose her but I need to let her know that if she keeps this up she would lose me. What should I do? Would giving her the silent treatment help? I've tried confronting her but she's a very negative person and would prefer distracting herself with games. When I told her I was worried about her, she said that she didn't like the way I was talking and she was worried that she might have done something wrong. She then proceeded to end the call and sleep it all off.

Last night, I tried to coax her to rest and get some sleep because she had been playing since 5pm and when she messaged me it was 11pm. She instead told me to play with her so I did and we played till 2 in the morning before we both left and decided to head home and sleep. But when she got back home, her friends from the cafe messaged and called her, invited her to go play with them at 7am. She would not have to tell me but she seemed to need my approval. She then jokingly told me that her friends called her and I knew that she wanted to go. Which made me feel as though my opinion didn't matter. I don't want to have to keep emphasizing that its hurting me just cause it sounds like I'm nagging.

I really love her and she always tells me that she loves me, but this is slowly becoming a big issue.

Updates:
p. s We dated for 6 months before becoming exclusive. We've only been officially together for 3 months.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • When do y'all normally hang out?

    Which games is she playing?

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    • Well we hang at my place, usually when I'm done with work, so that would be in the evening. We hang out 3 times a week but its dependent on our schedules. We make time but recently she's gone like bonkers with this League of Legends and Dota.

      I've just told her about how I've been feeling but I made the mistake by pulling my punches. Dampening the blows if you will. Probably cause I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

    • Show All
    • Still think you should tell her the whole truth.

    • Thank you for mhg :)

What Girls Said 2

  • I think she could be serious and hold an adult conversation if you have adult expectations. No kids gloves etc.. I think she could... but i may be a bit biased.

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    • She has the tendency of being really cold when she doesn't wanna talk about our problems. But she said that she's worried that she's been doing something wrong and does not want to make the mistake.

      I asked her, and I quote:

      'We've got to talk. I don't think this can wait'

      She replies with - 'You sound disappointed, I've already played for 11 hours straight. Alright I won't go this morning. I'll call you later, I don't like the way I feel when you're disappointed with me, I'm worried that I've done something wrong. Don't mind me'

    • Yeah i think its fixable.

  • You can't.

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What Guys Said 5

  • May be that's how she is as a person. It looks like you need to ask tell her to spend less time playing games and you need to tell her that it's disrespectful towards you , it looks to me as if she values her video games more than you.

    If she doesn't listen to you, then you should be prepared to leave her.

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  • you fix it by straight up telling her how you feel, and allow her to make the choice to spend less time gaming. If she doesn't then you'll have to leave her. You can't paint the image in your head that this woman is your soulmate, because they don't exist. You need to be prepared to leave at any point. There are many girls out there who would be good girlfriends for you. If you just stick around and take it, you'll waste years of your life for nothing

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    • thanks mate! I agree and I'm not convincing myself that she's my soulmate. There are a lot of good parts that I left out because there isn't enough space to write. But I've been dating her for a total of 9 months we only became exclusive after 6. So hence 3 months.

    • Me and a girl have been unofficially dating for about 2 years now, but now it has come out that she never wants to take it any further. Over this time I've come to love her more than I should have let myself without any form of commitment, but that's my fault. What I'm trying to say is, don't talk to long to make up your mind. The sooner you leave, the less difficult it is going to be to leave her.

  • Send her to me, because she sounds like my perfect wife. I'm a super hardcore gamer, and I would love the space of not having to talk to her all the time.

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  • league AND Dota?
    O:

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  • find a different girl who you are more compatible with instead of trying to "fix" someone who doesn't need to be fixed in the first place

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