Why would someone pretend to like someone?

My crush is a liitle intimate on email, but very distant in person. In email, we have long conversations between each other and she says she like me. In person, she only wants to talk to me with a 3rd party involved and even then, it is mostly a conversation between them. I think she was pretending to like me for some reason. I asked her this and she said "should I be? If you truly believe that, then I would persuade you otherwise." Eventually I got her to say she was pretending to like me. I asked why and she said: " to get a close friend". In the past, we flirted a lot, and furthermore whenever I would doubt about our future, she would fight for me like I was the most important thing to her. Now she says she never liked me. The worst part is that I believe her, but I don't buy that reasoning at all. I have been thinking about it all the time, and it has brought me so much pain. She know this, but whenever I would ask about the past, she would completely ignore it. Please I need to know. Why would someone pretend to like someone?

Updates:
I guess "lie" would be a better word than pretend in this case. Anyone have any ideas?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • They wouldn't. I think its probably her way of pushing you away for whatever reason I don't know. But it sounds its probably painful for her aswell.

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    • How do you its painful for her as well?

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    • Well for what its worth.. I hope you're happy.

    • I'm not, but thank you for the sentiment.

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What Girls Said 5

  • Because they are selfish... mean and think they are all if that, they believe they are better than you and they feel they are doing you favor by pretending... they are solely working on themselves, I know easier said than done... but get that person out your life

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    • I will try to get her out of my life, but honestly I still have a crush on her despite all of this. It really hurts, but I will try.

  • People usually play with another's emotions for 3 reasons, to get something out of it (usually attention), to get to someone else OR to keep their options open and to use you as a back up of some kind.

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    • From what I said above, what is the most likely explanation?

  • Either they just like the attention or they're keeping you as a backup

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  • It's an ego boost.

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    • Would she still use me as an ego if she was a shy girl?

    • Yes. Shy people especially need such ego boosts because they usually lack self-confidence.

    • Thanks for your opinion.

  • She might now be pretending, may be she likes you. But she is scary of falling in love with a guy. It happens to many people. From my experience, writing something down and saying how they feel, it is very helpful. In person, that female might get shy or not have the courage to tell that person how they feel. I tell you this because I was in a similar situation as yours before I move away from my hometown in order for me to work. If she is around be happy, not fighting. Because in the future, things turn out different and you may never see them again.

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    • Sorry, it's difficult to understand some parts of what you are saying. What is your advice for me?

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    • How do I know if she is falling in love with me?

    • She can be shy around you, or she might might be afraid to admit it.

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