How do I get my power back in this relationship?

I am really confused and could use some really good advice. My

boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 months now. We dated back in September for about 3 weeks. We broke up because he cheated on me. He kissed one girl and told two others that he liked them. The break up was not ugly, I just said that I could not deal with all of his girl drama, and I moved on. Well we started talking again in November, while he had another girlfriend that he was sleeping with. He eventually broke up with her, and we have been together since. We are very close, spend a lot of time together, and never fight. He does have some issues at home and with his family that he has shared with me. I am the only girl he has dated that is not a slut. I am a virgin,k and he is not. WE have fooled around and done some oral stuff. I am not quite ready to have sex. I just turned 16 and we have only been dating for 3 months. I told him this and he took it well.. He told me that he loved and respected me more. He said that he liked that our time together was not just about how far we would go. I told him that I want my first time to be with him, just not yet. Even thought he is telling me that he loves me more than life, and that I am his world, I sense him being a little distant. I am not a clingy, needy girlfriend, but I am not sure if I should talk to him about this. I have even sent him sexy pics of myself when he asked. I am always here for him...Always..I always reply when he text me, and I always listen when he needs to talk. I have even forgiven for some things that happened while he was smoking marijuana. I love him a lot, but I feel a little blown off sometimes. I need to get my power back and not give it all to him...How do I do that ? Guys and girls..Please help?


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • youve got to lay the law down...when he screws you, youve got to make it known your upset...aka PUT HIM IN THE DOG HOUSE...which means, no sexual stuff, no doing EVERYTHING he wants...when someones misbehaves, youve got to show them you are hurt or upset or p*ssed...dont drag it on forever, but you've got to lay the law down by showing him, somehow that you aren't going to deal with what he's doing and that you can get and deserve better...dont do anything dramatic but def put ur foot down, you don't want to be a door mat


What Girls Said 1

  • It sounds like he is taking advantage of you. Afterall, who really knows that they love somebody after only three months? And, for him to cheat on you is not a good sign. Yeah, it was in the past, but its still in his character.

    By you deciding to remain a virgin, he might think that he will just get his sex elsewhere. But I don't know the guy, so this may not be the case.

    Power is a sucky word for it. Nobody should be controlling the relationship, it should be mutual. And sounds like you are currently the underdog. The best thing to do is tell him what you want, and how you would like him to >>compromise<<. If he doesn't want to do that, and if things have to be his way, he's not worth it.

    The distance may just be a "guy thing". They aren't always as emotional as us girls. That just may be a part of him your going to have to accept for the time being until he does warm up. I dated a guy for over three years before I broke up with him. He kept a distance, and I lost my love for him.

    You have to think for yourself. It is not greedy to consider your happiness. You can't go on just trying to please him and feeling like sh!t because you are doing everything you can and he's not complying. That's going to ruin your self esteem, and its going to let him walk all over you.


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