I met a guy on a dating site. He is 45.
He was very keen straight away and rushed me into a relationship. I do try to have my wits about me but this guy swept me off my feet. The first things I noticed about him was the vast amount of Facebook friends he had, well over 1600. He also played the victim regarding his past relationship but never gave much detail. He also appeared very generous with his spending not just eith me but with others. Buying large rounds and was always on social media posting photos of him as if he was a real fun guy.
He put me on a pedestal. Said I was special and he couldn't believe he'd found me.
Several weeks into it he tells me he usually goes for younger women than myself but hadn't had much luck. And that he had a few people interested in getting with him.
I was a little hurt.
He litirally went from very interested to quiet after I missed a good night text. He sent me a message only to go on a ignore mine. I sensed he was annoyed at me and backed off. He then sends me a messaging saying is he reading too much into the lack of communication. I didn't give much reassurance as I too had become annoyed.
He then cuts me off quite coldly by texting a massive excuse about him thinking its not going to work long term. When I replied I had feelings he goes silent.
I was discarded. No contact has been made and it's as if he'd never met me.
is it possible I was merely just a source of supply?
Most Helpful Guy
To sum up a few key elements of Narcissts:
1. Hypocrites and a lack of a grasp of reality
3. Using grouppressure
4. Are always the victims
5. Need to find someone to make them feel bad in order to feel less bad themselves
6. Narcissm always stems out of feeling inferior and therefor is displayed as an superiority complex
7. Needs to make other peoples lifes as miserable as theirs and worse.
8. Is in a constant state of panic and angst
9. Often ends up doing the things to you to make you feel miserable which they are most afraid of
10. Is nice to you at first just to screw you over greatly later on just to make it look like an accident.
11. Needs to be in control.
12. Their craziness is their cover. Outsiders simply would rather believe it being an accident than thinking this person really is this crazy.
13. Lack of empathy
14. Overbearing sense of self-importance
15. Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
16. Requires excessive admiration
17. Has a very strong sense of entitlement
18. Is exploitive of others
19. Is often envious of others
20. Regularly shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
21. They demonstrate grandiosity in their beliefs and behavior
22. Expects constant attention
23. Is arrogant in attitudes and behavior
24. Has expectations of special treatment that are unrealistic
25. Takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
26. Has trouble keeping healthy relationships with others
27. Are often dramatic
28. Cannot handle criticism
29. Often tries to compensate for this inner fragility by belittling or disparaging others
Potential causes for narcissm:
- Excessive admiration that is never balanced with realistic feedback.
- Excessive praise for good behaviors or excessive criticism for bad behaviors in childhood.
- Overindulgence and overvaluation by parents, other family members, or peers.
- Being praised for perceived exceptional looks or abilities by adults.
- Severe emotional abuse in childhood.
- Unpredictable or unreliable caregiving from parents.
- Learning manipulative behaviors from parents or peers.1
Most Helpful Girl
This guy is a loser and insecure. The throwing of feelings, the buying of rounds, the acceptance on social media? All a cover up for the fact that he feels inadequate. He needs to go see a therapist. You're a catch, and I would be happy if I were you, that you managed to avoid this scum long term!1