When its cheating and when its affair? Where is their border?

Anonymous
I need to travel to a neighbor city every two weeks, there I met a girl and we had one night one time behind my gf's back but we did it 3 times again and start texting and stuffs like that , I don't want to start an affair because having an affair was the reason that my ex left me for. also I want to stop it right now but don't know how to.
When its cheating and when its affair? Where is their border?
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