How do you know if you hurt a guys feelings?

So me and my boyfriend has been having problems and honestly I'm sick and tired of him & how he treats me and he's always giving me mixed feelings so I don't know how he feels about me.. anyways I decided to break things off with him but also letting him know we can be friends just no more of us and i guess he took it the wrong way and got all mad started cursing me out, threatening me and saying really really mean hurtful things to me & I honestly didn't want to hurt him when I decided to break up I just didn't wanna be with him no more. The thing with him is that he never expresses his feelings towards me and always acts so cold and distant like he doesn't care about me and I tend to over think a lot and have to constantly guess what he's thinking and how he feels about me so I never knew if he had feelings for me or not.. but when I broke up with him that's when he truly expressed himself and it was very hurtful. Did I end up hurting his feelings causing him to react like that or what?


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What Guys Said 2

  • its both you and him and most guys are not raised for self expression or at least they weren't when i was your age and his. so with him not knowing how to expresses how he feels its coming from palce no one is allowed to be in in.

    like a place that has millions of locks and secret passowrds etc. and when he lets someone a=in even though he can't show it and ends upp bieng hurt by the one person he allowed himself to be comfortable with

    its like a steak to the heart and its gonna hurt for months if not longer and being the same with anyone else will be impossible. but he will get over it eventually being young does have its advantages when it comes to being hurt or hurting someone emotionally.

    dont worry to much over it because he will get over the hurt and move on but for a bit he will have trust issues from this and might not treat the next girl as nice as he thought he was treating you.

    • He never treated me nice from the beginning. ..

    • well you have answered your own question i guess, the guy is wasting your time and you should not give it a 2and thought. why worry yourself sick over what he says and does? you have better things you can be doing instead of letting this fill up time that could be better spent with a guy who will treat you nicer.

  • Ever hear that having a relationship is all about communication? This is exactly what it means. If you can't talk about how you feel with someone then you can't really be in a relationship and expect it to work. People need to understand what you are thinking and feeling. It seems unfortunate that your boyfriend for some reason couldn't understand.

    Don't ask people if you hurt him. I think it's obvious but the truth is that you shouldn't be having to guess how your boyfriend feels. He should really be more open with you in the first place.

    • Exactly!!! But when I try to communicate with him he tunes me out or leads to an argument

    • Show All
    • Exactly that's why I broke it off

    • @AlwaysAGoodDay Perfect, MHO here

What Girls Said 1

  • People who've been hurt usually react and respond out of their negative emotions.

    Sometimes they'll make rash decisions. Some people ignore you and cut all ties, others will display anger. People often say and do things out of character when they feel hurt, rejected or humiliated. . They may become verbally and /or even physically abusive.


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