We were together for 2 years. He really loved me i belive. But now he goes abroad and he said he can not continue in a long distance relationship. I said i would wait him until his education is over but he said that it is impossible. I really dont understand. Everywhere i go reminds me of something about him. All of the pictures, toys, presents.. His love letters. I can not move on. There are people that want to date me but i always reject them eventhough 2 months have passed. He still texts me calling me cute and lovely. But we are not a couple anymore. He is not together with someone i always try to get information about him trough social media. I guess i am losing it. I can not stop crying. I can't forget the best memories we had. He was my first love, first kiss. I can not move on.
Most Helpful Guy
Oh dear! Hold yourself together. I know it's easy said than done. The fact is, there are many great guys out there right now who are looking for a girl like you.
In my last breakup, the following worked for me; it could work for you too.
# Step 1
The first thing I do is embracing I cannot switch off my feelings for her like a switch light. Recognising my inability to effect a desirable change is itself relieving.
# Step 2
I feel the hurtful feelings of breaking up rather than diverting attention from them. It doesn't matter if it takes a day, week or month. Diverting focus from the hurtful feelings only decelerate the recovery process.
# Step 3
I accept she is no longer with me, instead of nursing hope and fighting for her to come back. This is the biggest mistake I made in my first breakup. It only heightens the pain and prolongs the recovery process.
# Step 4
I focus on the good memories she brought to my life, and on things I would have loved to experience with her. This shifts my mind from hurtful to positive emotions. The mistake I made with my first breakup is I focused on her frailties to convince myself she wasn't beautiful enough. I was merely lying to myself because if she wasn't good enough I won't have been with her in the first place.
# Step 5
I remove items (e. g. clothes, cosmetics, pictures, etc.) that I associate with her. I also block and delete all her phone number, email address and other forms of communication like whatsapp, etc., including the contacts of some of her friends.
# Step 6
While carrying out the above five steps I engage quite a lot in activities, such as meditation, running, gym and strolling in the woods and park. I set important activities to do daily, and focus on completing them.
# Step 7
I draw inspiration from my first breakup. I flash my mind back and challenge my behaviours and thoughts. My world didn't crumble. I dated beautiful girls after that. I then flash my mind back to current breakup. It then suddenly changes my perspective, confidence and mood. It's like telling myself I have been through this before, and came out stronger 6 to 12 months after the breakup.0