My relationship is coming to an end :( ?

I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now and lately we have been fighting a lot. He tells me he loves me but he needs a "break". A 2 month break to be precise. I don't like the idea.. I'd prefer it to be 2 weeks. I told him that we should just break up if it's going to be that long. We both love each other and he says he still wants to be with me but he needs some time to find himself. We have gone through a lot with each other and I can't imagine him being with someone else. I'm afraid he'll find someone new during the break. What should I do? I can't force him to stay if he doesn't want to.


Most Helpful Guy

  • It is hard when someone wants to leave but if that's what he wants then be brave and let him go. But please don't wait around for him. It is very unfair that he is asking you to wait around. If it is to end then that's it. It ends. No waiting. No promises of getting back together. It ends there and then. You need to be free to able to allow someone else into your life if that was to happen. Tell him this. You've got to be good to yourself and look out for you. Good luck!!


Most Helpful Girl

  • It's heartbreaking when you realise it's the beginning of the end and you don't know how to stop it.

    If that's what he wants then that's what he wants but I agree with you. Two months... Why two months apart? If you truly love each other then two months apart will be heartwrenching for you both. I'd ask him to be honest with you. Tell you how he really feels because I don't think he is being honest. It sounds like he is having doubts about the relationship, not about his own self realisation.

    Don't agree to something you aren't happy with, if you think two months is too long then say no. After two years of dating I wouldn't be happy if my partner needed two months away from me...

    Sorry I don't have any real advice for you.

    • I feel like he's not being honest too. But every time I beg for honesty he tells me the same, "I need to find myself".

    • Show All
    • I feel like there is someone else, but he's not saying it. There has been times when he'd talk to girls in a flirty way a long time ago.

    • That alone doesn't sound like a cause for worry. I don't think there's any real harm in having the occasional flier with someone. It's certainly a very long way from cheating.

      If you keep thinking he's being unfaithful it will have a seriously negative effect on the relationship.

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What Guys Said 1

  • I don't believe in breaks either. Move on and find someone who doesn't need a break from you


What Girls Said 4

  • The thing is you really can't stop him from finding another girl if that is what he wants to do, besides it sounds as if this 2 month break is in fact a breakup, he sounds as though he has already checked out of this relationship that's why he's suggested 2 months apart, it gives him good reason that if he finds another girl within that space of time he can use the 2months break as an excuse to maybe justify why he did, i think that maybe you need to see this for what it actually is and he should come clean and tell you outright whether he wants to fix or break completely not leaving you hanging, not a lot you can do except get on with your life, don't allow yourself to be put on hold.

    • I would agree with this too, sounds like he needs to find out who he is, by himself.

    • That's what I thought so too, but I keep asking him if there's someone else and he says no every single time. I told him 2 months was too much and that we might as well break up and he then said no. . Because he doesn't want to lose me. All of this is just confusing

  • If you love him then trust him. Give him 2 months, check up on him every two weeks and ask if he's doing well. but why 2 months precisely?

    • He wants 2 months because he thinks he needs to work on himself. He says he's not the same person he use to be when we first started dating. Which I believe because he's not theven same anymore..

    • that sounds kinda scary. i mean it sounds like he has an illness or has a dark secret that he couldnt tell you before (but then again that's just my bookworm thinking). Sorry if i made you worry. but yeah, give him time but also be there to support him. Fighting! (its a cheer i say) (=

  • I believe that when someone tells you they need to find themselves, they're in a very weird and complex place. I don't know if he wants to date around for sure but typically when a guy wants to test the waters they just say they need space. The "need to find himself" makes me think he's having identity issues. Maybe he wants to find his purpose in life and figure out which path to take. If he says he loves you and you believe him then whatever it is he is dealing with could make him hurt you and he doesn't want to do that. It sounds like he wants to protect you. You should give him this time no matter how much it hurts.

  • It's simple like he told you, he needs to find himself and figure out if he wants this relationship or not, honestly it seems he already has his answer.


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