Most Helpful Girl
U abused her emotionally she has learned to live life where she isn't being abused.. it's good that u admit u did wrong but ask any woman or man that's been in her shoes of abuse and they say they'd rather be battered than emotionally tortured.. which is what emotional abuse is.. it's torture..
Ur still being emotional abusive to use the no contact rule.. it's not about wanton someone back it's about improving urself.. I doubt she will get back with u.. she has to undo what u done to her for months and when she sees clear she won't take u back... being honest
No contact is solely for ur benefit.. uve now lost someone u love U have to face the consequences and improve how u treat women. It will fade in time the hurt of what u lost but u do see that now don't u? U have to change or ull lose everyone u will ever care about.. start a diary an write ur feelings down it does work honest.. it's one of the 7 steps of grief.. write anything that pops inside ur head and ull amaze urself at what u actually learn about urself.. ull go from grief to anger to sad then to acceptance and it don't matter how long it takes days weeks or months it helps..
Also hit the gym as well.. keeping fit puts u in a positive mood..
This is steps to change and improve urself.. force urself out to do stuff.. take time out of dating and start treatin urself better u will treat women better