I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. When we first met, I had been single for a long time and was feeling really confident, happy and great about myself, which is what I believe drew him in. When I met my boyfriend things were going well until I found out he had been messaging his ex girlfriend along with other girls trying to hook up while we were in a fight. After this, he promised to change and gave me his password on his phone. I decided to give him another chance, but I've been paranoid since and don't like the person I've become. I never went through his phone until I saw those messages and I can't seem to stop. Things started getting a little better but once I got on the pill, my desire to have sex has decreased and he constantly complains about it. He got upset recently and said "maybe we're just not attracted to each other anymore" he immediately regretted it and said he was just seeing what my response was to see if I still am. Ever since then, I've been feeling super insecure and I get really upset when he points out a hot female because he's made me feel so bad about our sex life and my looks. I'll admit he does compliment me a lot, but it's been hard to move past his mistakes and mean comments. Even when he says nice things, I seem to only remember the bad. I do love him and overall we have a good relationship, besides my lowering self esteem. Should I try to work on my self esteem with him and our relationship or do it on my own? Any advice is appreciated :)
Most Helpful Guy
Peace of mind is a creation of your own mind. He cannot provide it for you.
What he can do, however is provide a level of support where peace of mind becomes attainable. If you don't think he's capable of this or you've told him this much and he's still not trying, then I'd say build up your self-esteem, solo.
Just make sure to be honest with him.
With that information in-mind he'll either focus on improving himself for the better or return to where his thoughts had been lingering all along.0
Most Helpful Girl
It sucks to feel that way, I totally understand. I've been through the same thing. You have to stay true to yourself. If you feel like you are not the person you used to be, you should think whether you should stay with him or not. I wouldn't, personally. Trust is very important in a relationship.0