So me and this guy started off as friends, me and him have both been cheated on in the past and we both have very similar STRONG personalities. So we have known eachother for 2 years and he always liked me but I never had interest in him untill about 3 months ago we started talking. He was talking to someone and so was I but we were both having problems with the people we were dating. It was both nothing serious so we both ended it and begun to date. He took me around his family, which they told me he's never done before.. Everything was good we seen eachother every day. However jealously slowly came in with him. After 2 months of talking he asked me to be his girlfriend. 1 week into dating I found out he drunk called his ex. I got so mad and broke up with him. Right after I broke up with him he adds her on his social media and she approved it!! He eventually admitted he messed up and asked for another chance so I gave it to him. Anyways after that we'd have little arguments because my trust went down a little and he try's to get me jealous.. He had called his friend so we could hang out and she asked if he was bringing me or the previous girl he was dating! I automatically went off on him because personally it seems like he's still talking to her because why would his friend ask that? He broke up with me because he said I "assume too much". We've been talking and he said its MY turn to ask him back. Which I'm not going to do because HE broke up with me. Then I seen him on Instagram liking half naked girls picture but yet he deleted me off of everything.. I told him I'm just cutting ties.. But I miss him and it sucks.. Is it the right thing to do? Or did I overreact? Should I had tried to be with him?
Most Helpful Guy
I can understand your doubt and second thoughts. It's enough to drive a person crazy when you try and figure the other person's motives out. However, there's the solution:
Do not try and figure the other person out.
Because you will never get anywhere. You will be caught up in endless cycles of blame, jealousy etc etc.
Social media is a great source of frustration and jealousy. So ignore it.
So what should you focus on? You should focus on the only thing you have 100% control over: you. Focus on what you really want. Focus on what it is you like about him. Those are the things that attracted you to him initially. Whether you two end up together eventually or not, you will feel better in the process and you will be much closer to attracting these same qualities from him, or someone else.
Come to think of it, why would you ever focus on negative things? It's not like somebody is paying you to be jealous. So just let it go.
Whether you get back together or not is of course entirely up to you. The good thing is that there's no harm done either way. You can try again and if it doesn't work out, split up again. Try to stay apart and if it gets unbearable, get together with him again. If he doesn't want to, well then he doesn't want to.
I hope this gives you a bit of solace and makes a bit of sense.1