Should I break up with him?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about three months now. I loved him near the beginning but now all my feelings for him are gone. Everything he does annoys me, and I have to pretend that I still do love him. I haven't seen him in three weeks due to the lack of feelings I have. I want to break up with him, but I'm guilted into staying. He used to have a bad drug problem, and I'm the reason he cleaned up and has plans for his future. Whether or not he'll complete those plans is still in question, but he loves me a lot, and I don't. I know I would want the person to break up with me if they didn't love me, but I don't want him to spiral out of control because I broke his heart.

What should I do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's very understandable that you have some hesitation about breaking up because it can be uncomfortable. However, there is nothing unusual or cruel about breaking up.

    Any feelings you have, are okay to have. It's also okay to change. it sounds like you're really sure you're one and if so, I would definitely break up. However, if you stay a while that's okay too. Your discomfort will grow and you will eventually end up leaving. I don't suppose you'll marry him and have his babies out of guilt.

    So leave not, or leave later when it becomes unbearable, either is fine.

    With regards to him, he will be just fine. He has made those positive changes himself. You inspired him to do it perhaps but he did it himself, so he will be just fine. If I were him, I would want you to break up so I could get moving with my new life.

    Hope this helps.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If he spirals, that is his fault. He needs to learn how to control himself and stand on his own two feet. You can always keep tabs on him and make sure that he gets help when he needs it, but I don't think you should suffer for his lack of independence. Make like Idina Menzel, and Let It Go

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Three months and you're U18 lol have fun

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  • Break up. Teen's emotions are not fully developed, so this is normal. What you like one day could change from day to day.. month etc.

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  • Break up with him and hop back on the carousel. Spread some joy while you spread your legs.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Just be honest with yourself and explain to him that you can't do it anymore. You know you don't love so stop pushing that back. The reality is, if you don't break up with him, he'll find out eventually and then break up with you or cheat on you if he's too cowardly to do it. This is due to lack of desire to love him and to learn to love him. You can't get past his past and its still bothering you. If he has to change because of you, then that means he didn't change for himself. You can't feel guilty for something you didn't do. To have sympathy for him fine. But that should not stop you from breaking up. If his heart breaks, there is nothing you could have done. You are responsible for your feelings as he is responsible to his.

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  • You should break up with him. 3 months is not a long time at all, so if you are already feeling that you should leave. I dated a guy for 2 and a half years and then he dumped me suddenly due to the fact that he lost feelings for me. I would of rathered him do it earlier when he first started feeling that way

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  • In 3 months? It's not long enough as is. You need to do what's best for you. And at the end of the day he's old enough to look after himself. Not fair to lead him on when he could spend time seeing someone who does

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