Some background i'm 27, wife is 25, so my Wife cheated on me, I forgave her and now she wants to leave me for a wealthier man please help me?

my wife cheated on me the first time, I never thought she would do it, she is a wonderful and great woman, she has been faithful to me and always been talked highly of by employers, friends, and family, I never in amillion years expected this, anyways she cheated on me a year ago and I was devastated to make it short, I asked for advice online and the majority of females who told me to forgive and that girls make mistakes and that it would be wrong of me not to forgive her, I even got scolded a little saying I most likely wasn't doing enough, but I do try I swear god, we worked through it, and it was with some guy who's a woman beater, things were never the same though now fast forward, I get home to our apartment and she's saying that she's leaving me and she wants a divorce, to make it worse she did this the day before my birthday when she said she had a surprise for me, I asked her if we could work through and begged her but she has stated she wants her independence and freedom, I just don't understand, anyways she told me that the guy she's leaving me for is richer and has a masters degree and even made her came from penetration alone, after begging and crying, she left the apartment and I followed her continuing to beg until she entered a Porsche I'm guessing it was him, there was a guy driving. I'm really hurt and i don't know what to do, she works and I work both, the apartment was in my name but a while ago she convinced me to put it in her name, I pay all the bills and I pay for her car as well as my car that i bought recently along with our furniture, which I paid for as well, she keeps her money, she didn't believe in the concept of giving money to the man, didn't like it, and I agreed that It was wrong. So right now I'm not sure what's going to happen, she says she's taking me to court and her knew lover is going to hire one of the best lawyers there is, I can't afford a lawyer at all, I just want to know what to do because right now I'm so lost?


Most Helpful Guy

  • "My wife cheated on me the first time..."
    That should have been the end of it. Done, over, right then and there. Your choice to stay after you knew you couldn't trust her anymore is on you.

    "I asked for advice online and the majority of females who told me to forgive and that girls make mistakes and that it would be wrong of me not to forgive her..."
    You got some really bad advice. That is precisely why I don't ask women for relationship advice.

    "After begging and crying..."
    Okay, I get that she hurt you, but seriously? Begging and crying? Would James Bond beg and cry if a woman decided to leave him?

    "She says she's taking me to court and her knew lover is going to hire one of the best lawyers there is..."
    Hire a lawyer? Why? Unless you have significant assets, I don't see what a lawyer will do for either of you except run up huge legal bills. If you can reach a mutual agreement on how your assets will be divided, you'll both be much better off.

    • She doesn't want to hear it, I don't know what has happened to her but she changed from nice and friendly to this nasty spiteful person

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    • I just don't understand what went wrong, like I said she was the best wife that you could imagine, just great and perfect, the first time she cheated I couldn't understand why she would do cheat on me with a scumbag who treated women like garbage, and was a complete asshole to people, I could never understand why she was attracted to this guy. You know.

    • As you go through this painful process, the best thing you can do is think back on what you did right, what you did wrong, what warning signs might have been there that you didn't see at first, etc. And nobody is saying it's all your fault; relationships are a two-way street. She might have been all wrong for you from the start. Just a few things to think about...

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What Girls Said 2

  • Then why does your account say 18-24?
    I'm thinking there's a lot more to this than your telling here...
    But good luck to you - sounds like you 'picked a real winner'.

    • Didn't bother picking my birthday, plus I'm paranoid about giving my real birthday out anyways, and she isn't all bad she really was a great person

  • Hmmm...😌
    All the things that come to mind here. 😏
    Why do you think she is leaving? I personal feel that what she is doing is wrong.
    I am sorry, but there is much you can do. I mean there is marriage counseling and all that, but are you guys up for that is the question. :/

    • She just doesn't want to hear it, like I told the other guy she has changed in this short period from a nice friendly helpful great wife to this totally different person, I mean you would never expect her to be the same person, she has turned nasty and spiteful, actually she's acting like she's better than me or above me like I'm a surf or a nobody and ever since she's met this other guy she's royalty you know.

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    • Should I apologize, maybe It was my fault she cheated, maybe i don't have to move on and she will forgive me.

    • No, don't.
      It wasn't your fault, but hers.

What Guys Said 5

  • Document every single thing that you can about her cheating (both in the past and in the present with this new dude). Take that information into court with you, and fight like hell to protect yourself.

    Also, I hate to say it but you never should have taken her back after that first time. Once you do that (and all the begging) you became a doormat to this woman. Whatever modicum of respect she once held for you was gone.

    I'm sorry, man.

  • I would leave her (if she doesn't leave) and work on growth. She's not someone that really cares about you. She clearly wants a guy with money. She probably cares much more about money than she ever did about you. I'm sorry. She'd be good to leave though.

  • Your wife is a HORRIBLE human being, an actual piece of fucking shit. The best thing you can do is to never see or talk to her again in your life, get counseling to deal with the pain and betrayal then get on with your life and either remain single or find someone who is actually worth the effort you put into a relationship.

    No amount of anything YOU can do will save things, she will NEVER love you the way you love her or need to be loved in return. She will NEVER be worthy of your trust. She will NEVER respect you.

    you have all the right too
    she cheated you forgave her and she still cheated more

  • Goooddd Fuck marriage man... Just fuck it...


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