Ex and I didn't get to break up on good terms? How do I cope?

I've already blocked him on social media and his phone number.
He broke up with me twice.
1st time because he had mixed feelings. It was bad terms at first but then we ended on good terms though. Then he came back apologizing.
2nd time because I became clingy. He said it was a mistake coming back to me. We ended on bad terms.

He didn't treat me right and I was insecure.
I feel horrible because he disrespected me to the point where I had no self respect and I begged him to stay. He ended up saying he didn't want me and told me to leave. I was so devastated and fragile that I told him if I commit suicide it's his fault. The only thing I feel guilty about is using that manipulative comment to make him feel bad. I wish I could apologize just for that and for being insecure but I know I need to leave him alone.

Do you ever contact your ex and try to be friends with them or say sorry it ended that way?
How can I cope with my situation please? Thank you...
Yeah I do
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Sometimes I do
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+1 y
How do you just not say goodbye to someone and you just leave abruptly?
Ex and I didn't get to break up on good terms? How do I cope?
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