Ex boyfreind says the reason for him still keeping contact is that he still cares but not in the same way. ?

I feel mentally screwed by this. Will it end in hurt if I agree to accept this? What does it mean? -' am I a horrible person for just wanting to push him away completely so that I can feel I have a chance at a fuller relationship with Somone else? Or should I just relax? He broke up with me because he couldn't make me happy. I wanted to much. But why keep contact with me and not let me go? How do I get out of this I feel trapped and manipulated as my feelings for him are still very strong so it's defeating my logic. Guys please. Help me understand what this actually means when a guy says this? Is it playing games using? I don't want to seem crazy but it is driving me that way if it doesn't stop and I don't want to fight with him. We always fight if I try and say I don't want any contact ever or I confront his intentions


Most Helpful Girl

  • I feel for you, this guy needs to let you heal, you need to be strong and tell him... I need time to get over you, if you care then let me contact you when and if I need you.

    You then need to remove all ties to him, go cold turkey, no phone number, no social media, remove all possibilities of contacting him.

    Go on a date perhaps, or just go out and enjoy yourself but do whatever it takes to break the power he has over you, cause that is what he has, for some reason YOU are allowing this type of behaviour... break it. it may feel like he's being manipulating but what's worse is your allowing it.

    I wish you luck :)

    • If he has blocked you now is the time to remove every way you could possibly ever hear from him, change your number if that's what it takes, block him from every social channel and move on. It's hard but you are ready now!

    • Thankyou. Nd he's blocked me on social media too. He gets angry everytime I accuse him of having bad intentions for wanting to keep in contact if I ask him to either get back together or cut off completely I ask him to choose he goes nuts he tells me in crazy that I'm stalking him and blocks me. . He made his choice so maybe I just need to turn my back when he unlocks me in a few months asking to apologise but not wanting a relationship and messing my head again. I don't sleep with him either. Not sinse we broke up. So he Dosent get that from me. I wonder if he liked controlling me. He says really difficult things like how he loved me but Dosent see a future. He knows I find it impossible to move on with this going round and round all the time. I'm doomed. But I will try to cut off now

    • Don't try... do it, the more chance you have at contacting him the more chance you will, why do you want that power over you. it will be uncomfortable erasing him for a few weeks, but it will be the right thing to do in the long run knowing he doesn't have a way back into your life (other than seeking you out in person)

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What Guys Said 1

  • You didn't want too much he wasn't able or willing to give what you needed. He's keeping you around so he can occasionally fuck you when he can't find anyone else and to make you think he wants to reconcile. You're fucking up big time by communicating with him at all. Cut him completely and permanently out of your life.

    • Thabkyou for you're advice , -and he hasent been able to get sex from me. this has been going on for a year and I told him when he left me and wanted contact that I'd never sleep with him. So that might well be his intention but he hasent got that from me. I have confronted him about it and he's now blocked my number and Called me a crazy phyco and threatend me with a restraining order. He does this whenever I confront him. If I pretend I'm fine and be nice he's fine and contunines not to let me move on. But it always seems to be me that gets the crazy label. When I start a fight. I'm hopihg now he's done this blocking I won't hear from him again but I won't hold my breath as it happend before and it's always my fault. I nevertheless I didn't want to be a horriblene ex. I always prefer ending on good terms but still ending with no contact. He's just a mind messer

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    • It has been a year. And I hate drama. I must admit I've been drawn to it in the past and I didn't realise it but when I first met my ex He was very calming so I thought I was making a conscious effort to be around people who are the opposite of what I've experienced in the past. But towards the end he turned into drama and so did I. I don't know if I brought out the worst in him or if I'm just screwed to be constantly attracted to drama. When I first met this person there was never drama it's the reason I liked him so much it was a relief. I thought I'd finally found a grown up relationship. I'm unsure if this is my problem or his. But either way I struggled to let go I admit that.

    • Good luck to you

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