Mind game or real love?

Please help me, I'm sorry this is such a long question, but I need your help so please read.

We dated two years ago, broke up for a year and a half (I ended it only because he got distant). Then I got back in touch with him because I wanted to show my support so I went to one of his shows. He suggested we catch up. During our catch up I was trying to do the right thing by not mentioning the past, keeping it light and breezy and positive... and he - unprovoked - started saying all these little hints that he wanted to get back together, started holding hands, said I LOVE YOU... couldn't have been more clear in my mind. So I got my hopes up. And then after two weeks of dating again - something I was so happy was happening - suddenly I get a facebook message ending it. The biggest reason he mentioned was that he didn't want to hurt me again... he didn't see himself being faithful to me if we continued.

Does this sound like someone who does love me but is worried about cheating again (he kissed a girl once during our first relationship, I forgave him, people make mistakes), or does this sound like someone who played a terrible mind game on someone who he knew still loved him? Isn't someone who's afraid to hurt me someone who cares?

Please tell me your thoughts. I'm so confused and there's no one in my life who can help me sort out what has happened.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • mm... feel to me he might be playing a game. 2 weeks is awfuly short to change mind. and you said you dagted him 2 years ago, awfully long, what makes you think he hasn;t been with other girls in that span?

    tell m e more about his background. is this a guy that gets girls easily-good looks, personality good with girls, and so o n?


What Girls Said 2

  • I am usually a loving, forgiving person. I have had a lot of relationship experience... reading this I take it one of two ways: One, you broke off with him, he was getting even ( more like making the score even, and playing games) but in all fairness, he could really care for you, and is afraid he can't remain faithful. I had a relationship with someone that I knew very well, but we couldn't be together. He won't even have conversations with me any more as a friend, because when we do it leads to toxic sexual behavior. He doesn't want to hurt me further, ( I am a woman, I fell for him) so therefore he won't associate with me at all. He is not being mean, I have known him long enough, and we have talked about it. It is solely out of caring because he doesn't want me hurt... so with that said, you know him best. Can you have a sit down, heart to heart and find out? I always believe that communications is key, even if it hurts, at least you won't have questions... best of luck

  • People in love still hurt those they love. We are all imperfect so It's inevitable we'll say and do things , unintentionally , to hurt those we love and care about.

    It seems to me like he cares about you , but is confused about his feelings , and doesn't know what he wants right now. He's very indecisive just now in his life

    Most people are only loyal to their own priorities... their own needs and wants. As soon as their priorities change , then so do their loyalties and feelings. So in your case , he came back into your life coz it suited his purpose , but didn't hesitate to leave as soon as he no longer had a need for you in his life.

    You'll never know where you stand with him because indecisive peoples feelings can change from one moment to the next. That'll eventually have a detrimental affect on you emotionally and mentally. No one is worth more than your own emotional state


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