Ex is trying to talk to me after 2.5 years of silence.

Basically my ex and I dated for 2 years. Our families had been friends since he was young. We had a wonderful relationship for the first year, best friends, being our silly and goofy selves..chemistry out of this world...the whole 9. it went downhill after that. He let the whole "cop" thing get to him and I ended up catching him in tons of lies and seeing other women. he started talking down to me, being very suspicious and controlling and I have a bad temper, we'd get in fights and I'd push him and he'd push back. needless to say it was bad and dragged on for 6 months like this and he played tons of head games with me. for some reason neither could let go even tho I should have. finally broke up the last time I found out he was talking to yet another girl behind my back. we got our families involved and it became a huge deal and we never spoke to one another after a huge explosive dramatic fight. It's been 2.5 years now and now a day goes by that I haven't thought about him and wondered what he was doing. the feelings I felt were the most raw and passionate I've ever felt and no relationship since can live up to it. I've always felt like it must not have been as good or real to him as he acted like it was because he was living with the girl he cheated on me with within weeks after our breakup.

I am now in a relationship for a year and a half with a very good man who is very smart business man, loyal, good looking. Wants to marry me. Moved across the country to be with me. But I still think about the ex. A week ago he linked to me on Facebk and wished me happy b day. We've had a 4 hr serious phone convo about what happened in our relationship and how we let it go so far as naive kids. He agreed it has been the most meaningful relationship he's had to date, including the one he is now in. That he wanted to contact me to sincerely apologize and over the past few years realized what an idiot he was and how he treated me. It's been eating at him, how he treated me. I was the best thing he ever had. He was an insecure stupid kid. He's nothing like that now he says...he wants to meet for lunch. What do I do? Says he's not trying to be disrespectful or trying to move in on me but just really wants to talk to me and at least be able to be friends. We had a really strong bond because we went through our parents divorcing at the same time. I know he would prob break up with his girlfriend if I told him I would choose him over my bf. The guy I have now is amazing and don't want to hurt him or lose him but the ex and I just have this spark/chemistry I have never been able to duplicate. HELP. Kinda parallels the notebook movie, as far as the guys and her relationship with each of them and what they're like. Minus the cheating off course.


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What Guys Said 2

  • OOo this is a hard one.. Your gonna really have to decided this one on your own... I don't think you should take the chance in ruining ur current relationship if everything is fine in it for your ex. But if you feel like it is nessesary to do so then you can. But if you get back with your ex and things don't work out, don't think you can go back to the guy ur with now..

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  • I know what you mean about that certain spark, and how it just isn't easy to come by. You have to tread carefully though, as there are two other good people that could wind up very hurt.

    If you feel what you had with your ex was once in a lifetime--go for it! However, don't expect your current guy to be waiting for you should it not work out. Even if he is, the damage will have already been done. Be careful!

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