How do I deal with this?

There is this one guy I saw around school for a few years. We never had an opportunity to talk, although there were many times I tried to get up the nerve to speak to him (he tried too, but he was very shy around me).There was mutual attraction (eye contact, showing up where I am a lot, friends staring a lot, walking by me on purpose, etc.). It was one of those rare people you share a strong, mysterious, instant connection with.

The problem is he suddenly moved away. I have no way really of contacting him, except on Facebook, but I feel like that would be weird since we never talked or exchanged names, etc. I am having a hard time trying to forget him and move on. I didn't even know him, but for some reason he just has some mysterious pull on my heart.

I keep thinking, just find another guy, but there are just none that stick out to me like he did. Also, the fact that he suddenly disappeared makes me so mad at myself for never talking to him. I have no closure.

Does anyone have any similar experience?

How did you get over it?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Options!

    1. Talk to him on Facebook. For all you know the "man" you want to see isn't actually real and you're playing a fantasy in your head, if that's the case that'll definitely be your closure, if it's not then you'll have to come to terms with how things are.

    2. Admit to yourself you like him, which is fine, you cannot rationalize emotional connections esp. deep ones which form almost instantly so it's better to just say "I liked him" and to quit trying to pursue other people until you are comfortable with the fact that he was indeed part of your life even if you did not know him well.

    3. Scream at a mirror until it shatters.

    I'm going with #2 this time, namely because contacting him might be really bad for you in your current state with you kicking yourself and him being a fantasized entity you did not know well ( which means you've no disappointment, but eventually you'll have to admit that he could have been a total asshole in disguise and you just don't know it ) at all. Better to let yourself mourn his absence and let it go without this trying to "fill the void, rationalize the loss, and protect the self" movement you've got going on here.

    • I appreciate your feedback. I'm hoping he really is some loser so that I didn't miss out on anything. And, ya, I think the Facebook thing would just be really lame and worthless, lol.

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