It has not been going well with my exbf and me. Learned he cheated on me and lied a lot about the contact with them. So after talking a lot and he only told lies I broke up with him and asked him to move out (he moved in with me 1,5 year ago).
Thought i would feel relieved that it is over, instead I'm left with this huge pain insude of me. I really don't know what to do and the pain is killing me.
I really need some help.
Most Helpful Guy
You're grieving. Just like when you grieve the loss of a loved one due to their passing away, you are mourning the loss of the relationship, your partner and the life that you pictured together. His relationship values and yours are different. Can you see yourself spending the rest of your life with a man who is also seeing other women? If the answer is no, then you need to accept that you are both incompatible. It's only natural for you to feel like there is a gap in your life, but the yearning for him to come back and be the man of your dreams is your mind resisting change.
You will find someone who gives you butterflies again, and there are PLENTY of guys who are loving, caring, committed and faithful.
Be gentle on yourself. You're going to have some sad days, but they will be further apart as time goes on and you will be ok. I promise.
Try to read up on the grieving process and understand the stages you will go through so you can recognise, and accept them as they come, and go.
Take good care of yourself.1
Most Helpful Girl
You are going through the feelings of betrayal. It's very normal and I will request you to feel all of it. Beating him up would have helped but you dealt with it as a generous person. Not everyone is as kind as you are,
so I have to salute you.
BUT! Don't let that scumbag get back or! anything and everything that includes you taking him back, because - if he was the one, he would have done better! NOT WORSE! YOU ARE FEELING THIS WAY BECAUSE HE DID YOU WORSE!
And they will keep on doing this to you - till you are completely finished and over!1