I'm seriously thinking of breaking up with my boyfriend tomorrow, but I don't have the guts. Are these good reasons I should do it?

We've been official for only a month, he rarely contacts me, I always have to set up dates, and acts unknowing of my wants and needs pretty often. (Even though on dates he never runs out of stuff to say and acts very caring but only in person.)
My friends hate him for that reason (saying stuff like a guy you just started dating should be contacting you more than twice a week) and they all think I should break up.

We were in the middle of making plans and he said he was going to check his schedule for free time, I wait to hear from him again. Almost 24 hours pass, I don't hear from him and I send him a text, we start texting and it seems like he basically forgot that we were making plans. I had to remind him again if he was free tomorrow and he said yes.

tomorrow on our date I'm seriously considering just saying "hey you're a busy guy and I'm someone with too much free time, when these two kinds of people date it doesn't really go well, so let's just split up." I feel like I'm putting in all the effort here, and as much as I like this guy, he's made me cry myself to sleep on more than one occasion. He's a horrible communicator. And since long distance will be a thing in 6 months for about a year or two, I feel like communication is important.

do I have good reason to break it off with him? Or is an issue like this something that can be overcome? If I am going to break up, how can I gain the courage to do it?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Break up with him if you really want to. But never bring your friends into your personal relationship with your man. That's none of your friends business.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, I think you should tell him first what you think of the whole situation and basically "announce" your displeasure before breaking up. Maybe he thinks twice a week is enough and doesn't know you'd like to have more time together. If you tell him clearly what you think and he doesn't give you a reason or change his behavior to meet your needs to some extent, then I think you probably are too different to work out and should consider going your own separate ways.

    • Yes I do know what you mean, however I have brought up the displeasure before. He simply said that he trusts me enough to not have to be constantly in contact with me. How long should I give him to change his behaviour? I brought it up a few days ago.

    • I think he didn't get that you wanted to meet him more often. Because it's not a matter of trust right?
      You just want to be with him more often

    • It's definetly not a trust thing, I just really want to talk to him often, we do meet up at least twice a week so that's okay.
      He only talked about that trust thing when I brought up texting. He always replies if I message him first. But it takes him a few days (3-5) before he sends me a message first. He doesn't text his friends either so it doesn't help my cause.
      And he despises calling, as do I. It's just really awkward I can't even call my own mother without feeling awkward and running out of things to say haha

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Those are very good reasons. if you like to frequently have conversations with him over text and he's not into texting you much, then you are going to be miserable. Just different types of people.

  • It's only been a month! just dump the fucker lol


What Girls Said 2

  • i think it can be overcomed. i would tell him what's been bothering you and see what his response is. if he does try, then that's great but if he acts nonchalant about it, then i don't think you'll regret breaking up with him.

  • Hey, so before you breakup give it a chance. On the date bring up these issues and talk about them because relationships depend 100% on communication.

    Just bring it up and say something like "I want things to change because it feels like your two different people with me. When we're together you act like you care and when we aren't you don't seem to have the time of day for me." It doesn't have to be that exactly but something close to it.

    Give him a chance to try and change his ways otherwise call it quits then. Good luck!

    • I have already brought up the issues, so I do want to give him a chance, but how long should I give him before I can really decide to call it quits?

    • Bring the issues up again and I'd give it a week or two depending on how long you're willing to wait.

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