My boyfriend broke up with me but said to let him know how I am doing?

I am not totally sure why he broke up with me but I do have some good ideas ~~ but there was no other woman. Right before the break up things were extremely close between us with him wanting more and more closeness and me agreeing to it.

Then he said he needed a break. and gave me some reasons.I said OK. A few weeks later it turned into him ending it over the phone. This is when he said he still wants to know how I am doing. I said I don't know about that.

I just let the whole thing sit until I had some kind of gut feeling tell me what to do next. Then it hit me many weeks later to call him. So I did and he was totally happy and said he still thinks about me and loves me. We talked for a very long time and left it that we would continue talking.

Now what do I do about getting us back together? I know I hurt him and he needs to know that things will be different the next time around. Do I have to wait for him to make the next contact?




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Most Helpful Guy

  • who is that girl in your profile pic? she's amazingly gorgeous

    but to answer your question, you need to take things SLOWLY..it was the turtle who won the race, NOT the rabbit...remember that...

    just go with the flow, people DO change, he should accept that and if he wants he can give you another chance, vise versa...you both cannot live in teh past either or conflicts could potentially come up...my recommendation is to sit back and relax, contact him maybe next week...you don't want to seem desperate here...how did you end the conversation? was it liek ok call me later? did you jsut say bye? I mean depending on what exactly happened at the end of the realtionship depends on who contacts who...he broke up with you, so call him, be friendly, yourself, remind him why he fell in love with you, but don't say you miss him every time and love him, you want him to feel like he could possibly be losing you, when in fact he's really not, you want him to realize what you are to him...which I think he alreayd knows...

    yada yada yes I ramble lol...look just take thigns slowly you don't want to jump into the relatioship again and have it happen exactly as it did...hope this helps

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What Guys Said 4

  • IF you know why he broke up with you then you have to just show him that your trustworthy, and worth giving it another shot. Hope for the best, but be prepared for the worse.

    Let him know that your interested in giving it another go and want to take it day by day. Also don't be ambiguous at all just be open and honest, asking for the same from him. This is the only way you will build the foundation that will allow this second chance to work.

    Everyone both of you are responsible in some way for the split. Learn from it and see if you can't start fresh with only the positive memories.

    Good Luck.

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  • I did this same thing with an ex girlfriend. At the time I thought,all I ever do is hang out with her. I do everything with her. I really loved her but I didn't want to do everything with her. Looking back I'm still a little confused why I did it. I think I started getting nervous about soon to be married life. I wish now I didn't do it. I said I still want to see how you are cause I still cared about her and loved her. But then talking to her was short,she was hurt then I got hurt cause she was acting like she moved on. If your looking to get him back,dont talk about the past,talk about things current that you are enjoying,act like life is good without him. It might take some time but if you had a good relationship he'll be back.

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  • There aren't any rules about this. If he said it was OK to talk, then talk to him about getting back together! But be really sure you've resolved whatever issues caused the split in the first place. Don't let your emotions get the better of you.

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  • A lot of these preconceived notions and assumptions would be cleared up if the two people would just sit and talk to each other very honestly. I don't think anyone really answered your last question as to whether you should wait. Following advice I've gained from friends, they've clearly said, 'If you want to call her, call her.' If you feel like talking to him, then call him. Don't plan so much, don't think too much about what might happen or what ifs-- which will drive any of us nuts.

    It seems like he wanted time by himself to figure something out in his head before escalating in the relationship to a greater level of commitment or something. I personally would want to know why he felt like he needed to end the relationship outright rather than just take some time apart. A lot of times, the person giving an explanation is not totally sure about their explanation in their own mind-- but they're trying to impose some sort of reasoning behind their actions. That reasoning may or may not be a true reflection of what's going on in their head. But if the two people talk it out, they might be able to figure out if something is needed in the relationship.

    Good luck, don't worry, be happy, be confident.

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What Girls Said 1

  • WOW this sounds like exactly what my boyfriend did a month ago. We were wonderful together, never fought. I came home and he was gone. No forewarning. Gave me some lame excuses. And he's not with another girl, and he calls me and tells me he loves me and how am I doing.

    Maybe he got scared of feelings that were possibly overwhelming him. Maybe he saw how wonderful everything was then clammed up and got scared and left.

    I'd say when you call him keep it light hearted and let him bring up anything that has to do with break up. Try and be his friend for now. Just be loving toward him and let him know how much you love him and miss him. It seems he has issues in his own mind that he might need some time to work out.

    I'd let him make the next call. It takes men awhile to absorb feelings and call back. If you don't hear from him in a week, call and be casual and say, how are you doing?

    good luck to you.

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