Why does depression do this?

My girlfriend and I recently broke up. We were together for a while, and she ended it. Today, I reached out and found out why we split. It was because of her depression, and her fear of hurting me by pushing me away. I dont know what to do. I told her i knew she was depressed, and that I should have given her space, but since then, she has not responded to me. Literally the best time of my life was when we were together, but she just threw it all out. Should I wait for her to reach out? Why is depression like this? It took the greatest person out of my life.


Most Helpful Girl

  • "It was because of her depression, and her fear of hurting me by pushing me away." The way I interpreted that, was that she sacrificed the realtionship to spare you any misfortunes. She seemed to be getting too attached to you and broke it off before she couldn't let go.

    I really don't understand why people are telling you to give her space. It seems to me that she wants to know, to be assured, that despite her depression/mood swings, you're going to be by her side with open arms to help her cope. You know, depressed people constantly feel lonely, unwanted, a burden, lost, sad. Of course what they need is a support system. and what better support system than love.

    I think you need to let her know that you love her. That her depression could never push you away from her. That it hurts you to know that the person you love is struggling and you can't be there for them. Because honestly, to me.. especially at a low point in my life, someone I love keeping a distance from me is like a big fuck you to the face. I know you're backing off with good intentions. But still.

    • she's an introvert. She likes alone time, but she's also depressed, and honestly Im lost at what to do. She has not responded to my text, and I don't want to be a bother either. Its difficult.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, give her space. When I mean space. I mean space. don't reach out to her at all. give her at least two weeks. I know it's going to hurt waiting two weeks but if you really want her, be patient. she will come back within two weeks if not then reach out in two weeks.

    • Okay, thank you. Disregarding today, I will wait two weeks to check on her, unless she reaches out to me sooner.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Sorry to hear that happened to you. Depression is really hard to deal with and can make a person want to isolate themselves. She needs to work on herself. Hopefully she is getting help for her mental illness. It's not an easy thing to deal with.

    • I struggle with depression too, but I dont have the money for treatment, and therapy. My depression has progressively been getting worse day by day. Im just afraid I will never be able to see her again, and I would be left with just photographs, and our memories.

What Guys Said 1

  • My first car was reliable and looked good, although the interior was trashed. I'll never forget it as it took me on so many adventures.
    Sometimes I wish I had kept it and invested a heap into tidying it up, but I've also enjoyed every car I've had since then too. If I still had it, I'd be happy with it, even with all the rebuilds being a labour of love. So I guess whatever it is that you do, you need to be happy with your decision and just enjoy the experience.


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