My ex is starting to date someone else.

and I'm having trouble dealing. We were both each others' first serious relationship. He was amazing in the beginning. But as soon as we broke up (peacefully), he turned into a huge jerk. It was such a change from what I knew him to be. He got mean, gave really low blows, and even told other guys that might be interested in me not to mess with me because I wouldn't have sex with him. WHY do I care that he's dating this new girl now? It just happened so fast, now she's all over his Facebook pics/profile. More so than I ever was. I guess I'm jealous that I invested so much in him and he's showing all of this love and affection to some girl he just met. He didn't make me as obvious on his Facebook.

Maybe he's trying to make me jealous. But I don't know how to deal. I don't know what he's doing. Please help.

Updates:
She's very sexually out there, so I'm assuming they are having sex. We broke up because he began taking me for granted and thus started a lot of fights he was sick of having. He was always the one that was sure he wanted to be committed to me whereas I
was always a little rocky about it. It was sort of mutual but he ended up initiating the breakup. Although he tried to get back together with me a few times after that & I said no. He put up lots of Facebook statuses trying to make me jealous but has
stopped those. And now its just a million pics of this girl & him all over each other at parties. He always said how much he loved that I was classy unlike most girls in college. But this girl is straight trashy. I don't understand. Maybe sex was all he
wanted.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I recognize this, yeah that's just a bitchmove. And the only thing you can do is try to get over him. These things he's been doing will hurt you, but it will also make you get over him faster. And whenever the time's there, you will see that it's for the good of you that you aren't with him anymore. Because he isn't the guy he used to be.

    If he's trying to make you jealous, he shouldn't be mean to you. All I can read, he's just being a jerk. Go do more stuff with friends and family and try to get over him. It's a hard road, but it's a necessary one as well. Acceptance and moving on is the chapter you're in now and it's always hard, especially when he was your first serious relationship.

    And if he told other guys you won't have sex with them and that makes them stay away from you, at least you know what that guy wanted and it hadn't got a thing to do with you personally.

    Brief: He's just being an ass and is trying to hurt you to make himself feel better. Try to think to different things and do more things with friends & family than paying him attention, it's all in your mind...

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • I understand. I mean this, you should ditch and block him on Facebook.

    He's trying to make you feel miserable, because he couldn't get you back. Don't let him make you feel worse as he is the one who started it all and initiated the break-up. I think he's feeling bad that he didn't have total controll over you.

    Don't let him. Just block and (try to) move on. Trust me, it won't be worth it to give him any more attention, he doesn't deserve it. If he wants a trashy girl to be with, let him be. It might remind him to you and make him realise how stupid he's been.

    As Blue Lemonade said, don't waste energy on him. He isn't worth it :)

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    • Thanks a lot I'll try that. It's hard to cut someone out of your life like that but I've realized he definitely isn't the guy I though he was.

    • Yeah, been there. You'll get over him in no time, trust me ;) Afterwards you feel like it went way faster than you experienced it. You're gonna be alright :)

  • The problem is when you find a guy you really like, and he treats you like this and you still want him, lots of girls do that, guys like finding girls like this so they can do them and anyone else they want ...

    If you can move on great find someone who is better...

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  • Sounds like he got what he wanted, and he still thinks he can get back together with you in the future...still possesive of you, bet he wouldn't like it if you started dating someone else.

    Usually geting with another girl is done to make you jealous possibly hooking back up with you or he just wants to have sex with someone else he met, he might do it again say break up with her get back with you, meet someone else break up with you get with her etc...

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    • Well fortunately I stopped answering his calls and I would never date him again. It just hurts to see him all over this ho lol It almost makes me question my choice in men if he could see himself dating a girl like that. But you're right, I think he'd go crazy if I started dating someone else.

What Girls Said 4

  • Is he having sex with her? What was the reason for the break up? Did he break up with you, or did you leave him? It sounds like he is showing he off, flaunting her, but as to him trying to make you jealous, I need more info. He would only be doing that if the break-up hurt him, and/or if he was holding a grudge at you for some reason.

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    • I answered some of those questions in my update!

    • Yes it sure sounds like he is holding a grudge and is now trying to throw in your face how happy he is NOW, but I'll be he is miserable. He wasn't happy to begin with which is why he began treating you like crap, to make himself feel better. The next time you see him, turn your back and walk away. Tell him you don't have room for drama in your life.

    • Oh sry one other thing, I wasn't trying to say you made him unhappy. It was probably something completely out of your and his control which makes a guy feel even more sh*tty. :( Sorry honey, guys can be really cruel when they don't get their way.

  • I'm going through almost the same thing. Yes it sucks, yes its one of the most painful things but...there's only one thing for it I guess. Not wasting anymore energy on them. Missing them, feeling jealous, all of it, its all energy going towards them and they don't deserve any of it even though they were pretty amazing in the beginning:) You know you deserve better than him and even though it'll hurt and sting for a while just try you're hard to be so busy that you don' have time to think about him. And if you can, stay aaway from facbook adn him for a while. ugghhh, I know it kills I'm sorry you have to go through it:( Good luck:) Smile:)

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    • Yeah I'm glad I'm not alone in feelings this. Thanks for you help! =)

  • WELL HE CROSS THE LINE ! look honey once sex is involved you can never look at some one the same. so he's with some hoochie not f*** him I know that every one says that but that's what you have to do he's already sordid you don't know what she can have or he now . I STILL HAVE FEELINGS FOR MY EX HE WAS MY FIRST KISS FIRST REAL RELATIONSHIP WE WERE CRAZY TEENS WE DRANK EACH OTHERS BLOOD CARVED EACH OTHERS NAMES IN OUR SKIN WEIRD STUPID STUFF THAT WAS REALLY INTIMATE AND WERE SUPPOSED TO BE EACH OTHERS FIRSTS BUT IT DIDNT WORK OUT AND WE BROKE UP AND ITS STILL NOT THE SAME BETWEEN US I REMEMBER WHEN I FOUND OUT HE HAD SEX WITH SOME CHICK I WAS LIVID BECAUSE I FELT LIKE THAT SUPPOSED TO BE WITH ME YOU KNOW? BUT IT WAS OUT OF MY HANDS :( NOW IM A MOTHER HAVE A WONDER FULL MAN AND DAUGHTER BUT THOSE FEELING STILL REMAIN PROLLY CUZ HE'S MY BF'S BEST FRIEND. HE ONLY REALY TALKS TO ME WHEN HE'S DRUNK SO I THINK THOSE FEELINGS HE HAD FOR YOU WILL ALWAYS BE THERE BUT ARE NOT WORTH PURSUING CUT HIM OUT OF YOUR LIFE IT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN AND I THINK HE'S JUST OVER INDULGING BECAUSE INSIDE HE'S REALLY NOT HAPPY AND THATS HIS ATTEMPT TO FIX THAT HE'S WAY TO STUPID TO HANDEL THAT SITUATION AND EVEN IF YALL GOT BACK TOGETHER YOU CAN HAVE A ADULT RELATIONSHIP WITH SOME ONE SO STUPID HOPE THIS HELPS JUST HANG IN THERE :)

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    • Well I wrote that answer 3 days ago well I took my own advice and I'm doing a lot better its good to just cut all drama out of your life all together f*** them I don't need that sh*t and neither do you!

  • If it makes you feell any better it is probably a rebound. He might be posting the pics so you can see them and make you jealous. YOu are right a lot of men are jerks after they break up, I think its a defense mechanism and a way of coping. I know its hard but don't let him know you are hurt by this turn of events. Do a total 180 and if you do talk to him be happy and tell him how wonderful it is that he has found someone. see if that works for you.

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    • I hope its a rebound. It's embarrassing to see him so interested in a girl like her haha But I will try that. Thanks a lot!

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