How can I rekindle my relationship with my ex-boyfriend when he broke up with me after an argument?

My ex-boyfriend (of only three months) broke up with me recently a week after a huge fight we had. He was being extremely condescending, rude, and just moody with me, which made me break down crying. A lot of things were said during that conversation and I think I really wounded him by saying that he wasn't empathetic, was selfish, and made me sad a lot. I was heated and emotional and said things that I didn't fully believe in. He doesn't have good self esteem and I think I he took this as not being able to make me happy, and that he wasn't good enough (something that he always thinks of himself). When he broke up with me a week later, he said that he's not happy with his life right now, can't treat me as well as he would like to, and is nervous that he'll continue to say things that will make me upset. The more I think about it, the more I realize that I made a lot of mistakes, too, because I'm sensitive and of course have insecurities about my own worth to other people. We shared some really wonderful times, and have similar dreams and goals and views. I think we could have a really lovely relationship if we were able to try again. Right now we're going through the no contact phase -- he unfollowed me on some social media and I to him on some as well, and though we had a brief interaction on one site (just making jokes), he stopped communicating. He now looks at my snapchat story all the time, as does his best friend, and I know he's lonely. Do you think I might be able to rekindle a relationship? He said he was pretty final about his decision to break up, but I really don't think we gave it too much of a chance. We both said we had a connection from day one and I feel so comfortable and open around him, like I can really be myself. I want to try again but don't want to mess up trying to salvage our relationship. Any advice would be helpful. All the best.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Talk to him and tell him how you feel. Bottling up how you feel would only cause more pain. Next time you see him, tell him you'd like to talk to him somewhere quiet or private (you could also tell him over text that you want to talk to him).

    Then tell him you've been doing some thinking, and that you really believe you could both make your relationship work If you both give it a try again. The time you had away from him made you understand how much you appreciate him, and most of what you said during the fight you didn't mean them, you spoke out of feeling sad.

    Make sure to ask him how he feels too, the more he and you express how you actually feel to each other, the more you understand each other and the closer to healing.

    Explain to him that this experience would make what you both have together stronger.

    You guys seem good together.
    You just broke up, the feelings are still fresh. Better act now than wait till he's totally gotten over you and you wonder what could have been.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Kid, you don't want to "mess up" but you love him! You guys both screwed up but if you really think there's a chance or that you guys are meant to be.. Go for it.
    "At the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take." Try. Life, love, and relationships are all about trying, girl. (Sorry, I'm a bit emotional XD. I too broke up with my boyfriend and it hurts a lot. A

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    • (Accidentally submitted.. okay.)
      Anyways, as I was reading this, I couldn't help but think about my failed relationship and I really wish we could have the chance to fix it but I can't because... Well, I don't think can. I think it's really over unless he does. Unless he tries but I can do anything tbh... but you can! you have a chance, take it. It might not work but you'll be able to say "I did everything I could" :) Good Luck

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