I'm an emotional wreck...
I'm a guy, I have intense strong feelings for a girl, we never dated (Just a crush).
We go to school together, used to be friends, I really fell for her but she rejected me (Unclear). (She didn't tell me she had a boyfriend)
She gave me mixed signals, And I don't know what really happened.
This happened last year.
This year, she is dating a new guy. She got a really good job...
I'm a wreck... An emotional wreck... I never had any emotions before I met her, now I can't concentrate on anything.
She is stuck in my life, she is part of my social circle and lives right by my house and I see her very often.
Please help me not have these feelings anymore... There as so intense, we were never even in a relationship.
Most Helpful Girl
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper mho 19%
The easiest way to move on from one girl is to find a new one. The healthiest way is to focus on yourself and work on managing your emotions.
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- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
If the places you have been trying aren't working out, you might consider trying some new places.
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Where have you been approaching the women who turn you down? There are tons of places to meet people. Work, school, the gym, church, rec centers, hiking or photography clubs, volunteer organizations such as Habitat for Humanity, soccer leagues, dog parks, clubs and bars, hardware stores, online dating sites, mutual friends...
- Asker
Online Dating sites, mutal friends, Coworkers,
The girls at the gym are wayyy too fit for me, they can have any guy they want.
I don't go to school, church, or hobby clubs. - MargaritaPeach9 Xper
A lot of guys who go to the gym assume that those girls can have any guy they want. But sometimes they are shy and don't approach on their own, so they end up alone as well. Since there are lots of places you don't normally go, maybe you should try a few of them. Relationships don't just fall in our laps, we have to go out and actively seek them.
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Well, nothing solid happens overnight. Things take time. If you are feeling obsessive or your emotions are out of control, you might work on managing your health first until you are feeling stable, and then go from there. But I hope you find someone soon!
- Asker
My emotions are out of control, like it's so intense, I'm feeling everything, and I don't want to be so emotional and I feel weak
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Emotional does not mean weak! Being strong and disciplined does not mean you have to be a block wall, or that you can't have feelings. Also, if medical intervention or prescriptions help, that doesn't indicate weakness, either. Quite the opposite. Being a 'tough guy's won't properly heal a broken leg, now will it? Of course not. Neither does getting medical help for other things, if you need it. Just something to keep in mind.
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Pick one with a good rating and try one. A psychiatrist may be a better starting point than a psychologist, only because a psychiatrist can prescribe medication if they think it would help. Sometimes there are just chemical imbalances going on (that can be easily corrected) that cause people to feel more emotional than usual.
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Well, if what you want and what you have been trying doesn't work, sometimes it's a good idea to try something new. Even if it's not your first choice. There are other things you could try too, though. Being outside, getting more exercise, picking up new hobbies, things like that.
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Well, if it's an outlet for you to talk to other people then it might be healthy for you. If it just makes you depressed, then maybe it's a good idea. Only you would know that. But please take care of yourself either way. Things will get better.
- Asker
I don't feel well at all, my emotional health is very low, I can't get over her, I feel so sick
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
All of those things are signs that you need help. Not being able to get over someone that was never even yours to begin with is very unhealthy. Not being able to control your emotions can be very scary. Whether you want help or not, and whether you are in favor of medications, it sounds like things are getting to the point that you need some medical treatment. Please make an appointment to see someone right away, or call 911 if you are thinking of harming yourself. There are plenty of services out there to get you feeling better.
- Asker
I've had those thoughts, but not anymore...
It's really daunting finding a therapists... Overwhelming, I don't know what to say or email and it makes me anxious - MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Google therapists in your area, choose one, dial the number, and say "I need an appointment." It's very manageable. Anxiety is challenging, but you can take small steps to overcome it.
- MargaritaPeach9 Xper
Or walk into your school's office and ask to speak the guidance counselor or employment specialist. Or even a human resources officer could help you.
Most Helpful Guy
- Anonymous
This is called "oneitis" or "love" by people with different views :)
We don't choose our emotionability, like we don't choose our intelligence and beauty (and any other feature of ours).
If she lives nearby your place and is in your social circle, leaving thoughts of her behind becomes harder. You need to find another girl/woman you like much.
Meanwhile, try to make other friends (another circle of friends, maybe?), and engage in as many activities, hobbies and tasks as you can.
You can even find something (not someone) you love to do.
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I'm having a really hard time finding a girl to date or shift my attention to.
I keep getting rejected and am not really meeting girls