Why did he cheat with her?

My husband now but when we started dating. He has one child with a girl he wouldn't marry because to many lies, cheating and other things he said. But when their child was a year old his baby mama married and is still married for the last 7 years but also he has had affair with his baby's mama why he was single For 7 years off and on they have cheated on her husband that helps raise he's kid. He stopped when I started asking and raising red flags to him when we were dating. He choose me and then she got mad and has been making life hell ever since. He does no contact but for the child only , no more going to see child at her and her husband's house why her husband is at work and no more holidays with her. But she has not taking that ok... WHY? Can she not let him go? Will she ever? And why did he continue affair with her for so long and not feel wrong about it?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like she feels like you're taking him from her. Sad thing is, women like that give good women a bad name. As to why he would cheat with her. She had his kid. That makes him linked to her weather he likes it or not, plus there might still be feelings there. Be prepared to deal with Parental Alienation. Women like that will use children as bargaining chips to manipulate the father. Hopefully he has a good lawyer.

    A very good friend of mine was in a similar situation minus the sex. When she found out that he got married again she literally stalked him and threatened to kill his new wife. Additionally she went as far as telling him that he would never see his kid until he divorced his new wife. thankfully he took my advice and recorded all of their phone conversations and saved all of her texts and emails. When it came time to go to court to negotiate visitation he walked away with full custody and a restraining order against her. I think the girl is in prison now.. can't remember why though.

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    • Yes she has took child from us for 3 months already on lies that were dismissed. We got attorney we got child back now. she drop child off for our outside wedding and stayed and video me walking down the aisle. when my husband and her were together she would slam her head into floor, walls and stuff to make bruises cause he would try ending it with her. With this type of girl why would u continue sleeping with her why she's married. It worries me. It took 5 times of her not knocking at our home and coming in with drama before he told her we would pick up at the jail for child exchange. She has narrisstic traits bad. But it took him so long to not do holidays at her house and it was always I'm not to see my child even when there has been a parenting plan for vistions he's always done it her way. Will he go back to doing what she wants in time after all we've done to push her out. their history is what is unsettling. she's done bad behaviour and he continued on threw the years w/her

Most Helpful Girl

  • She gets to have her cake and eat it too? She clearly enjoyed having sex with your now husband, and she got to have it while still having her husband. She's upset that her perfect, having her cake and eating it, scenario has now ended (due to you). Perhaps she will let him go at some point, when she finds someone else convenient to replace the role he had in her life, perhaps she will never, it's difficult to say.

    As for the last question, that's one you should ask him. The most we can do is speculate. Perhaps he assumed her husband knew and they had an 'understanding'. Perhaps it just didn't occur to him because socially/culturally cheating is acceptable. Perhaps he just didn't want to look a gift horse in the face, no strings attached reliable source of sex.

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What Guys Said 2

  • my guess is that it's a sex thing, she must be more securely compatible with him than her current husband. she'll NEVER like you, but when it comes to leaving you alone, she may.. she may not.. depends on what personality disorders she has. she'll definitely try to use their kid to manipulate him.
    just make sure he doesn't end up cheating on you.. hopefully you two have killer sex so he won't feel tempted. . . .
    some guys AND girls can be that simple and evilly inconsiderate to their lover.

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  • When you get a woman pregnant you alter a few DNA markers. Science has just began to notice it was possible. So no clue if it effects her or him but I can't imagine it plays no role.

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    • That and they may have Sexual Chemistry that forces them to Fuck when angry at each other out of spite.

What Girls Said 1

  • The affair was convenient and because she can't have her way. Simple as that. Some women don't deal with rejection well.

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