Why is he saying we're friends when we clearly aren't?

About five months ago, my ex and I broke up because he stopped loving me. He seemed really gung ho about being friends but he's made absolutely no effort to maintain a friendship with me. Two weeks after our breakup, I sent him a text wishing him good luck with his play that he was in. When I ran into him at the mall, I greeted him and gave him a hug and we texted for a little while afterward. The last time I spoke with him was about two weeks ago and he seemed really happy to hear from me and responded pretty quickly, but he never takes the initiative to reach out to me. It could be because he's afraid, for whatever reason. When we first started dating, I was the one to take initiative. I was the first to express my feelings, initiate a relationship, and I was the first to kiss. Taking charge isn't really his forte I suppose. But I just don't understand why someone would say they wanna be friends, tell OTHER people that we're still friends, follow up on my business, and do absolutely NOTHING to maintain a friendship. I know he lost feelings for me (within a matter of fucking WEEKS) during our relationship, but there was once a time when he couldn't go a full day without talking to me, wanted to hold me, wanting to be with me. I always believed there was a friendship within all of this. You'd think he'd want to maintain contact with someone who was once such a huge part of his life and not just drop them like a hot potato in an instant. Do you guys have any insight on what might be going on with him and if I should say anything?

And dont say say it's because we've had sex and it's awkward, because he's still best friends with his ex fuck buddy.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • i would need more information about him. you say he is friends with his ex. but who contacts each other? maybe he is like that. maybe he is friends with benefits with his ex and that is the only reason why he contacts her. maybe he feels like you still like him and he doesn't want to lead you on. you said a lot about yourself and what you did but there is little information about who he is and how he acts with other people.

    • She's not his ex, she's his ex fuck buddy. They started out friends, because they're in the same friends group. After they stopped having sex, things were awkward because she wanted a relationship and he didn't. About a month later he reached out to talk it out with her and they've been best friends since. They were even best friends while we were together and she herself had a boyfriend at the time and was always very supportive of the two of us being together. Sometimes I think the only reason he remained friends with her I because they're in the same friend group, but I see that they are genuinely good friends and I just don't understand why we can't have that. Maybe because we were too serious.

    • Show All
    • That makes sense. Thank you for actually taking the time to analyze what I'm going through and formulate a response, I'm so sick of people telling me to just "move on." It's much more complicated than that and I feel like you get it.

    • no worries. i tend to like giving advices since I can't seem to figure out my own. hahaha. feel free to ask me anything anytime. good luck

What Girls Said 0

Be the first girl to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!

Recommended myTakes