We had a messy breakup, but we were together for almost 6 years. He was a best friend to me, too. Pretty much grew up with him. Anyways regardless of that - he contacted me and we talked a lot over the phone and text. He was calling me "love" and telling me he loved me and missed me. He promised to call me one day. Never heard from him. He just said his "head is a mess" and got all distant, just stopped talking to me. Then rejected if I tried to call and ignored my messages. So obviously, I stopped trying to contact him (after stupidly calling a couple times and texting) cuz I was worried. I just feel really hurt. I'm in a vulnerable spot as it is, and he was telling me how much he loved me, missed me, we flirted and he was calling me pet names. I feel like a total doormat. Like he likes to keep me hanging from a string cuz I'm always here for him. Why would he do that to me? Come in and out of my life like that, pretty much playing games? He has been like this in the past. Not very available, is only there for me when it's convenient for him. (Part of why we broke up and I moved away) but how does someone who loves you, do this to you? I'm just trying to understand. Will he contact me again? If so, I know not to respond. I'm just hurting. Sorry for the story. Appreciate if you've done or been through something similar, want to share. Or just hear your perspective. Thanks :)
Why would my ex contact me, talk to me for almost a week, then ignore me, reject me & disappear?
What Guys Said 2
I've been on both sides of it. I know it doesn't feel good and it feels as if he just used you but maybe what it is is that he still very much cares about you but is trying to not let the relationship you guys had get in the way of him caring. But of course it does and he then feels like crap because of it. So he decides it may be better for you if he goes.0
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He doesn't love you, not in any sense that makes his love worth having. He picks you up when he needs you and then drops you when he doesn't. The only way that he can get away with this is if you let him. You have to wake up and smell the coffee, as I'm sure you're aware now. You cannot let him back into your life in any capacity, he has demonstrated that he will just drop you as soon as he is bored, has a better offer or his head becomes 'a mess'. You don't need that kind of inconsistency.
If he should make contact again I would suggest that your immediate response is "Fuck off, grow up, stop wasting my time".0
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