I just got married few months ago. 15 months and god has blessed with me with a baby boy recently. I am a student and my wife too.. Since our marriage she has moved to my house (from another country) and we had a lot of arguments, fights at the start as every couple have. Things were getting better but of course since she has given birth to a baby. she was acting very weird and it was getting unbearable. A lot of time misbehaving with me disprecting my parents. I told her to go back to her house and spend some time with her family and make her mind up. We both agreed on this and she was ready to come to my house. She kept asking me a lof of times if she can come now but for some reason i though its better for me to give her more time its been 7 weeks now. Even my family isn't happy with my wife. When my family talked to her family about her behavior my wife got very upset. Eventhough i made few mistakes ofcourse arguments, comments about her family. Last week she messeged but i didn't reply because we both were angry. Now she has blocked me from everywhere and doesn't response to my calls, messeges. I tried to talk her, called her, told to calm down so we can solve issues but she isn't responding at all. eventhough she messed it up. i even said if she wants to get seperated i am okay with that but she didn't respond. she couldnt survive without talking to me for a day
I am assuming her family told her to cut off with me so for a reason. Her family is very much involved in her matter just as my family. MY mum is telling me to wait and have a patient and wait untill they react. but ofc i couldnt live without messeging her so i kept doing it over again and again.. I was very angry when i saw that she is friend with someone ( guy) she had a contact before marriage and i told her to remove him but she didn't..
please suggest me what to do that wife who was soo possessed with me and we had great life.. Is she with someone else or is it worthy to invest in our relationship
Most Helpful Girl
you sound so immature and totally not ready for a relationship let alone a marriage. you cannot even have a conversation. blocking each other and ignoring calls, you sound about 15.
the phrase about 'misbehaving' really grinds my gears too, you are ADULTS. YOU ARE EQUALS. SHE IS NOT YOUR CHILD AND EVEN IF SHE DOES SOMETHING YOU DISAGREE WITH, IT IS NOT "MISBEHAVING".
why did you even get married in the first place? and even after that, why were you selfish enough to bring a child into a dysfunctional family?9
Most Helpful Guy
You are in a really messed up situation. It should never have gotten this far, but it has. What's past is past and can't be undone.
Going by what you've said, the future doesn't look good. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't try to work it out, because I think you should. It's going to take a lot of effort on both of your parts.
You need to quit fighting and start talking. I think you both sound too immature to be married and have a kid. That's going to make it more difficult. It sounds like you are both thinking of yourselves too much as individuals, rather than thinking as a couple. In order to stop fighting and start talking, you need to stop acting like immature kids and start acting like an adult couple, and like parents.
You also need to get both of your families out if it for now. They are not helping, they are hurting. In my opinion your marriage and your child have to take top priority for now. That means taking priority over your families until you give a chance for things to work out in your marriage.
"we had a lot of arguments, fights at the start as every couple have."
Every couple is going to have some arguments on occasion. But it sounds like it's far worse with you two. Don't make excuses for it by thinking it's normal, because it's not. A lot of fighting like that is a symptom of something else. Don't sweep it under the carpet by thinking it's normal.
"I told her to go back to her house and spend some time with her family"
Why the heck did you do that? Was it really so bad that you couldn't stand the sight of each other?
You've never actually said what she's done. You said you were fighting. About what? You talk about her behavior. What behavior? You also seem to be putting all the blame on her. I'm sure you play a role in this too. You can talk to her about the things she does, but she has to change herself. You can't change her, but you can change yourself. That's something within your power. So you very seriously need to take a good hard look at your own role and decide if you are adult enough to change some things.
You two sound too immature to be married and have a kid. But that's already done. The both of you need to grow up real fast and start acting like adults. You have to start with yourself, because there is nowhere else you can start. This is in your head. Never forget that you only have control over your own words and your own actions. Make up your mind.2