Is intending to cheat as bad as cheating? Would you leave your spouse?

My friend confessed to me yesterday that when her son was an infant (over a year ago), her husband was on Tinder looking for sex and she almost left him over it. Their son was a preemie and spent some time in the NICU, so that took up all my friend's time and she said she hadn't had sex with her husband for 6 months as a result. She understands that was hard for him, but at the same time she said there's no excuse for cheating on your wife like that (or intending to, anyway). She called a divorce lawyer and meant to leave him, but changed her mind at the last minute because of their son. She wanted to keep their family together. Plus she said she'd have to pay him alimony since she's the higher earner. So they saw a marriage counselor and their relationship isn't great at the moment, but it's manageable. She doesn't sound happy, but not miserable either.

Honestly I found that really strong of her... I don't think I could stay after having my trust broken like that - especially right after having a baby (who's in the NICU, no less). Would you have done the same as her?
Is intending to cheat as bad as cheating? Would you leave your spouse?
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