Guys, how do you know you're over your ex girlfriend?

I don't think about my ex that much and I'm not upset about the breakup anymore but I can't help but feel like I don't want to date anyone else because I'm not over her. Everytime I look at another girl, that's really attractive, I don't get the urge to talk to her or want anything to do with her. It's been a while since the breakup and our relationship wasn't that close or intimate. Are there any guys that feel this way? It's as if I'm over her but not at the same time.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Do you not want to talk to her because you compare her to your ex and she comes up lacking or do you not want to talk to her because you're scared of getting into another relationship and getting hurt? If it's the former, you're not over your ex and although you say you don't think about her that much, you are thinking about her. You need to remind yourself that each person is different, when you realize you compare her to your ex, stop yourself and try to get to know the girl for who she is and learn what makes her unique and special. If it's the latter, you might be over her, you probably just need to be in a place where you're ready again to trust.

    • It's not that I'm afraid of being in a new relationship or I'm comparing them to my ex. I don't compare them to my ex on the spot. I just don't feel the urge to talk to any girls like I did before the relationship. I just thought that I might be subconsciously comparing them to her.

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    • You're right, it is conflicting. It's like you said, I didn't realize I was comparing them to my ex, subconsciously, until now. That's why I asked other guys if they felt the same way.

    • I compare my them (guys and current boyfriend) to my exes, but not in a bad way. Things like, oh my boyfriend likes strawberries but my ex liked kiwis. It's never things like looks or personality or how they treat me, as long as I'm okay with their looks and personality and how they treat me, it doesn't matter if my boyfriend buys me less gifts than my ex, gifts don't make a relationship and there's a reason the ex is an ex after all.

What Guys Said 2

  • exact feelings homie. best way to get over an ex is to fill the spot with another one

    • That's my problem. I could be talking to girl who I would have found to be a total 10 before my relationship but after the breakup she's a 2 as if she isn't worth my time. I feel like I am subconsciously comparing her to my ex.

    • I just put the ladies on hold and focused on myself like health, school, or my future.

  • I'm over them almost immediately.

    • How long are your relationships? I feel like that's almost impossible even for the "manliest"of men still have some sort of withdrawal from their relationships. I mean it's how the brain is wired unless your brain is wired differently.

    • anywhere from 4 years to a few months. I understood that there are lots of people out there, so it's easy to get into another relationship.

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