How to handle an encounter with the ex-girlfriend?

This questions is directed to both the guys and girls.

Just wanted to get your opinion on an encounter with my ex-girlfriend last night. Before I get into the details, the background to our previous relationship is below:

-We dated for 2 months roughly and had been separated for about the same time

-Given both our work schedules, our relationship was a bit rocky given that we hardly had time for each other

-However, while I would want to spend most of my free time with her (to get to know her better, have a relationship, etc...) she she would not want to spend it with me, but rather with her friends (she has never asked me first whether I could make time for her)

-Also, she insisted that we "party" separately given that she feels uncomfortable having me around

-As a guy, I could not stand these things and decided to call it quits

-Post the break up, I went out, started seeing a few other girls and became emotionally detached from her 100%

I was at my usual bar/lounge where I hang out the most with my buddies and out of nowhere I see my ex-girlfriend. The funny thing is, we met there for the first time as well. I tried to play it cool as much as I can. The first time I ran into her that night, I was busy passing around shots to some of my other friends, so couldn't really talk to her. But later on into the night, we bumped into each other talked for a bit.

From that point on, she kept on telling me how much she missed me and what not. I tried avoiding to talk about my feelings by looping in some casual conversation with some of my other friends and her friends, etc. This seemed to keep her at bay for a bit, but she seemed to bring back the topic to her emotions, etc...

Now at this point we are both a bit tipsy and for some reason start making out. I quickly think to myself that I shouldn't be doing this and tell her lets go for a breather outside. I suggest why don't we go somewhere quiet to talk things for a bit. She says ok.

As we are walking down towards this other bar, she insists that she goes meet her friends. I became a bit shocked at her response and tell her that if she wanted to talk to, it had to be now (given that I have a busy schedule for the rest of the week). She says no, and that I could text her if I wanted to talk to her later this week. I say sorry I can't do that and leave her to her friends.

When I wake up the next morning, she sent me a text over night saying "was nice to meet u, good to see you are doing great after so long! xx"

I am not sure how to respond to this message... it almost seems as if she's trying to mask whatever she told me last night... perhaps is she trying to cover off/cut off whatever had happened last night?

For some reason, our encounter rekindled a small spark in my heart and I cannot get her out of my head...

What would be the best approach to this situation?

Your help is much appreciated!


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  • You should just be friends with her.

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