Hi, so I just need help figuring out where I stand with my ex.
So last year my ex and I had a very bad breakup in which he cheated on me and then called me crazy and made me look awful in front of everyone we both know. We both are in college so the break up happened during our semester, and then the following summer we still kept in touch and would hook up.
The fall semester after our break up and the drama we ended up living in the same building. So the girl he cheated on me with was in a club with him, a club he refused to leave. he kept telling me nothing is happening between them anymore and to get over it and would emphasize how he won't leave his club. During fall i caught him with this girl 3-4 times and each time he would deny it even happening and once again would make me feel crazy and stupid.
Then winter break happened and he left for a trip, when he returned he completely ghosted me only seeing me twice during that semester and that was simply to hook up.
recently we started talking again and he says how he doesn't regret ghosting because we needed time and we again hooked up twice. I still dont know for a fact if he's with her or not and I feel stupid for still speaking to him.
This entire break up broke me, i lost so much and he won. He lied and cheated and walked away being the better guy and I was left alone and with a lot of people ready to talk trash about me.
I can't figure out his intentions and dont know what to do. I want him to love me again and for us to be good but i dont know what im lacking or doing wrong.
Basically I am looking for advice on why he's doing this, if he will ever get back with me or simply how to let go and move on. Thank you so much for listening
Most Helpful Guy
I assume you want honesty...
I can't understand why you got back in touch with him and slept with him. He didn't hurt you as much as you think he did. If it did, you would not do what you ended up doing. The bottom line is he proved, without a doubt, what a pice of crap he is and how little he thought of you.
The guy treated you with no respect and continues to do so. Why would you keep taking his abuse and being treated like a dog. The guy has no respect for you, only wants you for sex once in a while and he is in heaven because you will let him do ANYTHING to you and you keep coming back for more abuse while he gets to use you over and over. When are you going to understand that he does not care nor does he want you. You have proven over and over that he can do anything he wants to you and you will accept this while giving him sex when he's in the mood. You need to learn to respect yourself before others will respect you. Those around you know what you keep accepting from this guy and, most likely, have little respect for you as well. The first breakup was on both of you, The rest of this stuff is all on you because you keep going back for more and more as he continues to show you how foolish you are. There is nothing to love about him and you will never get him to love you. I doubt he has the ability to truly love anyone. I'm sorry, but all of this is because you keep going back asking for more. Stop your behavior and he will no longer be able to use and abuse you. He is not a person you want in your life. When you learn to accept the reality of your situation, you will be on your way to healing.1