Hey Guys, My story is rather long, but i will try to make it as short as possible. My boyfriend and I had been dating for4 years and a half ( im 27 he is 25). We were a very happy couple and had amazing chemistry. For the past two years, we have encountered a lot of challenges and had many fights though still had a great relationship. we have gone on several breaks, and even mentioned breakups but didn't really go there. We always figured out a way to work things out, but somehow problems still occurred. We had times where we would solve out issues maturely, others not so much. He is the type of person that does not handle emotions to well, especially negative ones. The problems overwhelmed him a lot, he never even got to a point of saying I love you, although I know he felt it in his own way. Three months ago, he got hit by an infection and was not able to see me for months. We dealt well with space, and it increased our emotions for eachother. Before he got sick, we had just gotten a from a break and planned on working our issues out. however, one month ago we had a bad fight over the phone, so bad that I lost control. We broke up few days back. He told me that he is confused and doesn't feel ready for a relationship right now, and that it wouldn't be fair to me. He told me he has strong feelings towards me , but over time felt restricted due to our differences and that it has affected him in a personal level. I know you probably hear this a lot from break up stories, but our relationship was very special and different. I realized what I've done wrong, and told him. He seems to be sure of his decision although he said he is confused. I need him in my life, and need him to realize that we can work this out, and haven't really given it a proper chance. How can i do that?
Thanks a million.
Most Helpful Guy
I see all these posts about EXes... Why does my ex not like me? This and that about an ex... should we get back together...
An EX means.. in the past. In my life, after any break up, an EX is out of my mind. I move on almost immediately and never think of, try to contact, check up on, etc.
Breakups happen for a reason...
I'm not talking about someone who moved away... I'm talking about relationships that ended due to cheating, abuse, incompatibility and such. an incompatible person will still be incompatible. An abuser only gets worse. Promises "to change" are always lies.
Who CARES about an EX? Who cares about what an EX thinks of them? I see people who whine about an ex spreading rumors or posting negative things on social media. Who cares? Their opinion should not matter at all. They are an EX... the past. No longer involved with you.
Then "breaks"... what's that all about? all this is is an admission you can't commit in a relationship. Taking a vacation from a relationship isn't going to fly.
ALSO... getting back together after a breakup.. or chasing someone to get back together... sorry folks, the same issues are gonna be there.
"But I still love hm/her" So? That doesn't mean THEY love you back. There was a reason the relationship ended.
This "closure" What's that about? No such thing... So what? It's over.. there is your closure.
Move on... where you found one guy/gal, there will always be more. Everyone goes through MANY breakups in their lives. This EX is just on in a long line of future exes. That is life.
Be well and be realistic.0
Most Helpful Girl
It's best if you give him time. Dont try and force things much longer otherwise it will be tougher on you. Just be there for him and still be supportive to him and when you see things are okay tell him how you feel. If he still remains with his decision then slowly start to accept it and move on. It may be hard at first but who knows maybe in a few years things with him will be back and it eill turn out much better. Dont put yourself down. Focus on yourself and the things you like whilst still being by his sife, dont create expectations and you'll see how things will turn out for the best. Good luck and may God bless you!0