Cheating?

Over 2 months ago I cheated on my boyfriend. I ended up sucking some other guys d***. I regret it so much and today he found out about it and now he is lost, confused, upset, and at the point were he doesn't know what to do. how I ended up cheating on him was I went with this guy to smoke a few bowls and then he started talking all sexual and sh*t and then he started to touch me and sh*t and then he took out his d*** and he like shoved it in my face and I was like wtf and he was like just suck it and we were out in the middle of no where and I didn't know what to do and on top of not knowing what to do I was higher then a kite and I always make dumb mistakes when I'm high, so it just happened and I was to scared to tell my boyfriend and then a month went by and I just thought I wouldn't have to deal with it anymore but then it came back up and now he can't trust me and he doesn't think I even want to be with him or anything, how can I get him to believe me that I do want to and how to I gain his trust back ? I really need help without Brian I would be totally lost and confused. I love him with all my heart. :(
Cheating?
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