What are my options with ex belongings at my place?

It's been 6 months since she left and was already dating someone else. I've asked her kindly to pick up her furniture and she makes excuses. She even left two dogs for me to take care of. Asking what are my options without being an ass. There is no hatred, don't want to be used as storage.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'd tell her without being rude that you want it gone and that if she doesn't come get the stuff by the end of the month you're going to assume she doesn't want it and dispose of it yourself.

    • When that is said she tells me I'll be there such n such date to see what is left behind. She knows what is here and I don't hear/see her on the set date. Will get a random text a few days or week later on different topic.

    • Stand your ground. Tell her if you truly want things gone that if she's not there, you're getting rid of them. That's not rude on your part. Hell, you've already told her several times so it's not like she could get mad at you for getting rid of her things.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I went through this with my ex.

    If you can, try to get her belongings back to her. Send post and email letters with return receipts / proof of delivery and being read, and ask her to get her things. I would also check "abandoned property" laws in your area to see if you have any obligations about how her things must be discarded. If it's not too much effort, then box it up and drop it off on her front doorstep or with one of her close friends or family members. Otherwise look at how it can be discarded.

    As for the dogs: tell her to get them, or else they can go up for adoption (i. e. petfinder. com, the local shelter, etc.).

    • Thank you for this information.
      What is left behind is furniture and few other misc.
      As for an address she is at, that might be next to impossible. Texting is the only way we communicate.

    • Same problem here: my ex and her roommates got evicted from the house they were renting. I tried email and post mail to try to reach her, but they always got returned as "undeliverable."

      Since she had a decent amount of stuff and I knew where her grandparents lived, I just rented a U-Haul truck and dumped her things off in her grandparent's driveway early one morning.

Recommended Questions


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 0

The only opinion from girls was selected the Most Helpful Opinion, but you can still contribute by sharing an opinion!

What Guys Said 3

  • assuming you are in the usa, 90 days equals legal ownership in most states. considering you went to some effort to give it back, politely inform her that you will be selling all of her stuff if she doesn't come and get it in 5 days. after you give that grace period, sell her stuff and do what you want with the money seeing as you legally own the property.

    • 90 days? Was told if she received mail here she has right to live here. Some of the items to my knowledge she is still paying for.

    • it depends how long has she been gone? depending on the state her property is considered abandoned after moving out. in Kansas it's 30 days (my state) in Virginia it's 24 hours. on west Virginia it's 48 hours. it varies state by state. regardless of weather or not she is paying on it. I'd have the rental company pick it up if she is but legally she can't do anything to you, and they can't do anything to you either if you dispose of it either.

      for example, if you rent something from rent a center, they can't come in to your home to get it, they can sue the original renter for financial loss though. you are protected because of property abandoned laws so she can't touch you. possession is 99% of the law.

  • Tell her in a letter and send it by mail that requires her to sign for it. Set a date and if it is not gone by then, give it away. (Or throw it in the trash.)

  • give that shit back in a box

    • If boxing up furniture was that easy lol

Recommended myTakes