Pregnant and boyfriend left me for someone else! Help?

I'm 18 weeks pregnant and ex of 4 years left me when I was 8 weeks pregnant for someone else... he's cheated in the past but like an idiot I've took him back. But this time it was for a different girl while I'm pregnant.
He wants the baby and is here for me for everything pregnancy related, but says he doesn't want to be with me.
I love him so much and just want him to wake up and come home. I thought it would be a rebound but now it's been over 2 months and I'm getting really scared!!
He has been coming over and cheating on her with me behind her back... and says he still loves me but doesn't want to be with me that he wants her... and then drops me for days/weeks on end,

I am so depressed and confused. I literally have no one!! Why the hell is he doing this at my most vulnerable time? I try not contact but after a day or 2 I cave and turn into a desperate idiot...

I wish I didn't want him back but I do... I don't know what to do x
Updates:
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P. s no friends or close by family, I'm 26 and live in a 2 bed house alone l, I'm not working right now and my days are literally spend alone doing nothing 😔
Pregnant and boyfriend left me for someone else! Help?
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