He WON'T let me go?

(Sorry English it's my second language)
I've been dating this guy for a bit over two months, and things got serious quite fast, at the same time things got really messy really fast.. continuous fights, jealousy etc... Of course I was to blame for many of the things he was feeling hurt from, but for how mean I might come off as, that's not what I think a relationship should be looking like.

Now of course I really liked him, but a lot of times I found myself wondering if what I liked the most was his attentions and love, or him as a person.

Of course he is really attractive and smart, but most of the time I felt things circled around him, his issues, his past and his future.. I tend to eclisse in this realtionship. And some times it makes me feel a little sick.

I tried to break up with him for the past 3/4 days and things got messy. He started talking me into thinking that I am wrong breaking up with him, that I'm being selfish, that I never liked him, that "if I separate him from my negative feelings towards our relationship I will be able to notice how much I like him" and that we will be able to go over our characterial issues.. and then talking about his complicated past and how he needs me. I feel I am not strong enough to leave him, and I don't know what I am doing anymore. Any help?
I start feeling that maybe there is something wrong with me, maybe I'm being selfish and running away from this realtionship without giving him more chances.. I don't know..


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • You have 2 options. Option 1: Stay with him and allow yourself to be mistreated and unhappy. or Option 2: Leave him and be happy. Ask yourself what's truly holding you back.

    • I guess I'm held back because of the fear of being a bad person, the fear of being yelled at from him, the feeling of wondering if he might be actually right and I am mentally instable as he claims for trying to run away from relationships.. aaah... I should stop giving so much power to influence me to the guys I date

    • Show All
    • No. I like him, it's nice to have someone next to you that treats you with love. But he his so possessive that it's killing me.

    • So it's a "no'. You know what needs to be done, so be strong and do it.

What Girls Said 2

  • This is terrifying. You need to get out asap.

    Bring someone with you when you break up with him once and for all so he can't manipulate you. Make sure that other people know where you are so that if something happens, people will know to look for you.

    He doesn't respect you. He doesn't even care about you - he just wants to own you. If he cared about you, then you know he wouldn't force you to stay with him when you're unhappy.

    • Oh wow.. I never though about it form that perspective.. thank you so much.

    • No you are not selfish. You deserve to feel safe. This? Questioning why he doesn't want to let you go? Is not you feeling safe.

      He's not good for you. Quite possibly he isn't good for anyone. You need to get away from him and never return.

    • Thank you so much again.. I didn't even realized I was deep down scared of him and his anger.

  • You have to be strong enough.


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