How to get my fiance to want me back?

My fiance just broke up with me. We had been together for almost yrs. I realize he broke up with because I'm not the person I use to be. I'm depressed ( not like suicidally depressed). I don't enjoy life like I use too. I really f***ed up bad with him with getting drunk and smashing his friend's window in. He says he just wants to be friends and wants me to help myself with my depression. I love the guy so much and I want us to work. I hurt him so bad. It doesn't matter how much I say I'm sorry to him for abusing him verbally and emotionally in the past. He won't take me back. He's moving in with his folks tomorrow. I'm seriously wanting us to work and want to realize I want this. I want him to want me back, Is there any way I can encourage him to be back with me( like he use too). I still have faith we can work. It's just he has given up. I have stuck with him through the bad. Is there a way he can want me again. I know he still loves me. Just doesn't wanna deal with the bullsh*t anymore. I know for certain I wanna change for myself too. It has affected me and him.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I am in the same boat that you're in right now. my girl broke up with me because of my bullsh*t too. What you need to do is you need to try to meet somewhere, not your place and not his place, somewhere neutral. if he agrees, you need to sit down and have a serious talk with him. also put everything out there.. the final decision is his, but once you lay out all of your cards and tell him what he means to you and how sorry you are and how much you love him, don't text him, don't call him, don't ask anyone about him. act like you are doing just fine. he will soon realize what he misses and you'll be surpised that when you least expect ift he'll talk you you out of now where. just be patient. if it's meant to be, he'll come back.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • Problem. It's not him. It's you. Quit expecting so much from him when he can't expect anything from you. You need to fix yourself before you " fix" him. You need to clean yourself up. Get it together. Go to counsling. Or yoga. Or something. No ones perfect but you HAVE to love yourself before you can love anyone else. That's what he wants from you, to love yourself and to love life. And then love your lives together. Take things a step at a time. Focus on you first. Then on getting him back. Then learning the skills to bond your lives. Sure it'll be hard but it's way easier to love one another and "make it work" when there's equality and never forget that a man cannot love a woman that doesn't love herself.

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  • I think you have to let him go, but promise him you'll change, then actually do it! If you stay friends he'll see you getting your life back on track and will hopefully give you another chance. I suspect he's doing this to shock you into keeping your promises, so you're going to have to suck it up. Don't make a scene when he leaves, be calm and tell him you love him very much and know you 've let him and yourself down and that you're going to show him you mean it this time. Good luck!

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