I'm obsessed with my ex, how to get over someone?

It was 4 years living together, we both are 30. We had a life like a marriage. We loved each other, we were friends, we had passion. Travelled a lot and moved out from Brazil (our home country) to try a new life here in Ireland. It has been 2 months from the break up now.

Of course, we had our fights and communication problems. But for me she was the one, the one that I want to really get married and have children. She felt the same, she told me that when she dumped me. I've treated her bad, I said things that I don't believe, she did too. But I'm still don't believing it.

She seems that got over me, she is seeing guys, splet with one of them (she told me). But I can't be with another women, I feel that I'm betraying my feelings and I know that I'm dumb for thinking this. I've tried once but I don't have the moves that I used to. And all I can I think is her. It's really hard to know that someone that you loved so much for 4 years in weeks can have an intimacy with another person, so quickly. Seems that I'm nothing, just the past.

We've tried to be friends (extremely wrong), now I don't have contact at all, I've blocked here everywhere. But today she called me asking for for help, she's trying to find a job.

I feel devastaded. Ashamed, guilty, unhappy and with no self steem at all. I used to have a lot of self steem and had no problems getting girls but I'm the kind of guy who wants to settle down, I prefer serious relationships.

I was trying to get her back, but after read a lot I know that's is impossible. Now I need to get over her, I'm afraid to be in this state for a long time.

Thanks in advance for the kind words.
Ps: sorry for the grammar.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hi i read your message and i want you to know that it never n easy task to get over ex. i have also be a victim of this some years back i could not get my life back again because of the love i have for him, bu today we are happily married back together it a long story on the steps i took to get him back in my life. if you still love her and want her back i could help you with all i did some years back i will want you to email me on my mail so that i can let you know what to am going to wait your mail mccasart @ gmail. com


Most Helpful Guy

  • I have written a my take about moving on! go read it. hope if will help


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What Girls Said 2

  • I think in your case that intensive therapy is the only option.

  • thats tough. being in such a long relationship and breaking up suddenly is hard, i think that you should talk to her and try explain your feelings.. did u guys just break up cause your relationship was going bad and u couldn't work on it? and she was done? if so then id move to another country if i were you or at least travel for a bit, that way you'll get yourself away from her and will be able to meet new people and start a new life.


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