I was dating this guy for 2 1/2 months. the problem was , he had just got out of a 4 year relationship maybe 5 month prior and she cheated.
we did everything like a couple, he introduced me to family, best friends , but NEVER MADE IT OFFICIAL. However we talked about making it offical and he said he wants it to happen on its own, but that was a reason we would argue because I'd question why he wasn't making it official with me..
he was the type to not show his emotions, and horrible communication. He had a lot going on in his family : his mom is an alcoholic, they have no father in their life , and his little brother who's 4 has a life threatening disease.
I tried my best to ALWAYS be there, even when he never opened up to me, I told him I wanted to be the person he runs to when life got hard. background info: he was jealous and would get mad if a guy friend would text me. would try to control me and I wouldn't let
he just started getting distant in a week. we wouldn't see each other much
i would ask him what's going on and he wouldn't take my questions serious he would make a joke.
so I put an end to it Because I felt like I was putting my all and was getting nothing in return..
we hadn't talked for 4 days so I told him I needed closure. he came over and I asked why was he acting like that,
he told me he has a lot going on in life and (he's 20) he needs to find himself. he said he looks at himself and feels lost.. like he doesn't know which direction his life is going in.. and he told me with what his ex did it's hard for him to start a new relationship and I'm just so upset. I feel like I wasted my time. he basically told me that he felt he didn't waste his time because he saw what an amazing girl I am and how I have a huge heart.
my question is, is it possible people need time by themselves? Like I don't see why he needed to let me go.. he said he wanted to end on good terms and I told him no because I was hurt. Do you think this was a legitimate reason?
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This all sounds too familiar. I just got out of a 6 year relationship for the same general reasons. I loved her more than anything, and I always will. We met in college frshman yr, we graduated and moved back home to different states. She landed a stable job. I went back to grad school, still have another year, but I don't know where my opportunities might lie once I finish. Unlike her, I currently have nothing that grounds me, nothing that defines me, bc I don't even fully know yet who I am or what I want. Hence my struggle: what will make me most happy in the end? I truly love this girl and I see a life with her... true love is rare... do I hold on tight and never let go? or do I do the logical thing and let her go, in hopes to not only find myself, but also to avoid even greater heartache from our (seemingly) inevitable failure. She eventually did exactly what u did - demanded answers to questions (questions that truly caused her pain and anxiety) - which I just couldnt provide to her at the moment. So for the sake of both of us, I finally made the hardest decision I've ever had to make, I broke it off.1