I think it's been four months? But I wanted to just message him and apologize. I keep thinking about him, and I think that's mainly because we ended so badly, and I feel so guilty about the whole situation. I understand we can't ever be together again, and sure I may want to, but if it ever came down to it, I wouldn't date him again. I went through enough heartbreak, and I realized how he brought out an ugliness in me. Anyhow, I feel like apologizing to him will create a more sort of peaceful closure? I think things are better when they end peacefully, it's easier to get over it. Am I crazy for wanting to do this? I feel like I'll be able to move on with my life. I don't want to be friends, I just want the air to be clear. I just don't want him to be like "omg my girlfriend from months ago is psycho."' Is this a bad idea?